Last Movie Watched Thread

Watched Stretch this morning, the movie Universal thought was less deserving of a theatrical release than 47 Ronin. Not as great and fun as Carnahan's The A-Team, but diverting enough, and has moments of balls-out insanity that are pretty entertaining. Patrick Wilson is only decent as the lead, but seeing actors like Chris Pine and Ed Helms partake in the films lunacy is pretty neat to witness.



Quick fun observation from the movie; judging by his starring and producing the Christian movie box office bomb, The Identical, I'd assumed Ray Liotta was a super hardcore Christian, but a small sign of his Christian faith (Hey! That's the religion I belong to!) comes through in one scenes where he refuses to take the Lord's name in vain. Despite saying all kinds of swears and obscenities like "Fuck" and "shit" in his cameo, during a phone conversation he says "Gosh dammit" and not the more common "Goddamnit".

Foxcatcher is fucking boring.

No, I won't elaborate on that.

"Listen Up Philip" - Jason Schwartzman is a pompous asshole writer who takes up a residency with a Rothian writer. Elizabeth Moss is his girlfriend I ended up cheering for.

I enjoyed it more than I expected, but it needed 75 percent more Eric Bogosian, which I am willing to elaborate on.

Years ago in college I was hanging out with a new group of friends and one guy in particular I thought was going to be a great friend, because we just got along so well. Anyway, he was and still is a fantastic friend, but some small part of me will never stop judging him for loving this movie and making me watch it. I hated it so, so much. 

Up - "Oh, master(ful)!"

I'm watching Dallas Buyer's Club right now, and thank goodness things are looking up because I was having trouble not coughing myself.

Psycho Beach Party (2000)


A parody of the 50s psychodramas, 60s beach movies and 70s slasher movies, with mega-doses of camp. It's really good!

Usually what happens when the story you are telling is only half of it. Yes, I REALLY hate breaking up films into "2 parts". Sequels are cool, straight up cutting a film in half? NOPE. I will get down off my rantbox now, sorry.

Anyway, I'm sure it was better than Drive(2011)

Tonight I watched Dirty Ho, another Shaw production. Dirty Ho is actually the name of the lead character, a jewel thief who gets taken under the wing of a prince, who's next in line for the throne but wants to do nothing but drink good wine, check out antiques, and hang out with women. In the beginning, Dirty Ho keeps trying to get some jewels that the prince confiscated from him, because the prince is trying to teach Dirty Ho how to be a better man instead of a thief. Dirty Ho doesn't realize the prince is a kung-fu master at first, after which he agrees to be taught by him. All the while, the next guy in the throne is sending a bunch of assassins after the prince, who all end up being defeated in some highly amusing set pieces. The gimmick in this film is that everyone is trying to hide their skills, so all the assassins take on the appearance of something innocuous, such as a cripple or antique seller, and they fight the prince and Dirty Ho while simultaneously trying to stay in character. The whole thing is like some proto-Jackie Chan type stuff, with lots of physical (and verbal, the characters are quite sarcastic) comedy and heavy use of the environment and props in the martial arts scenes. Not as quirky as The Eight Diagram Pole Fighter, but more untraditional at the same time. There was naturally a wacky training scene, in which Dirty Ho has to balance some small cups full of hot wax and flaming wicks on his shoulders, and attempt to kick different spots on the frame of a wooden box, which of course is also on fire.

For my film criticism class we have to write a piece of "auteur" criticism, and I was planning on doing the Shaw Bros production company, but then I realized all the films I've seen from them are directed by Lau Kar-leung, so I guess I'm gonna write about him instead. Dirty Ho also had the best cinematography of his films I've seen so far, although all three have been great. Excellent wide angle framing, and the camera movement is just phenomenal. Really love the music as well, there was a lot of variety.

To be honest I really questioned breaking the last book up into two films, especially since I think the book itself is very sparse plot-wise at times, but having seen Part 1 yesterday I think I might be glad they did. I have a feeling it will allow them to use a lot of the important emotional beats to their advantage instead of just rushing through everything at the end. Might also mean some important upcoming deaths are more deeply felt, similar to the last two Harry Potter films. 

Yeah, I don't know what his problem was. I liked reading your post.

I didn't even think that people would consider my post a joke. Dirty Ho is very much a real film. Am I that naive? D:

To jump way back for a second, I certainly don't ENJOY The Devil's Rejects, but I respect it for what it is. I think it's a much better homage to grindhouse movies than Grindhouse was because for the most part Grindhouse ignored how overwhelmingly exploitative and gross grindhouse movies often were, whereas The Devil's Rejects more or less reveled in it, which didn't make it a better viewing experience but did make it a more accurate homage. I do think Rob Zombie is capable of great filmmaking (the opening credits sequence and final scene were great from a cinematic standpoint, in my opinion). It also does a good job of never making the Firefly family anywhere near sympathetic but still confusing you as to whether you should be rooting for them or not by the end. Anyway, it's not a movie I have any desire to watch again, but I don't think its accomplishments should be ignored.

This morning I watched The Guest. A few people had been talking about how great it was on Twitter, but I know Adam Wingard also did You're Next, which people also said was great but which I thought was just another blah slasher movie. The Guest was better than that, but still nothing great. The plot could have just as easily been done as a crappy straight-to-video movie in the 90s starring Tom Berenger or something. Still, there's plenty to recommend, particularly the synth pop soundtrack. Good rental, wouldn't buy it. 

I watched Girl-Child With a Bow Fights Other Children to the Death and Philip Seymour Hoffman is in it For Some Reason Parts 1 & 2 on yesterday at the behest of Ladyviking.  I think I saw part 1 on an airplane a couple years ago, but 2 I don't know about.  They were both pretty good for what they were.  I would probably have loved the shit out of them if I were 14 years old, hadn't seen Battle Royal, and hadn't read Lord of the Flies (which means I would probably have to adjust that age to 12 or 13, because I read Lord of the Flies in middle school).

I preferred the first one to the second as the ending to the second one made a lot of what happened during the deathmatch seem kind of problematic, mainly, if Philip Seymour Hoffman wanted Girl-Child With a Bow to join rebel forces so bad, why was he himself actively trying to kill her during a deathmatch?  I could understand if President Donald Sutherland was all up in Philip Seymour Hoffman's grill about it ("Yo Philip Seymour Hoffman, you should totally make that island spin until Girl-Child With a Bow pukes and then falls of the island and drowns!"  "Um....okay President Donald Sutherland.") but he was just like, "We should totally make her barf...nah she's going to be the leader of the rebel forces now..."

Anyway I think this watching of Girl-Child With a Bow Fights Other Children to the Death and Philip Seymour Hoffman is in it For Some Reason was to prepare me for the latest installment of this film series which Ladyviking wants to see this week.