dＬᵒ
Prolific Poster 
𝓐𝓻𝓮 𝓦𝓮 𝓒𝓸𝓸𝓵 𝓨𝓮𝓽?
Posts: 4,533 
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Post by dＬᵒ on Aug 29, 2019 22:58:33 GMT -5
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Post by Pastafarian on Sept 12, 2019 19:36:38 GMT -5
"People Are Freaking Out Because Prince Harry Closed His Own Car Door"
I just can't.
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Post by Prole Hole on Sept 17, 2019 10:06:20 GMT -5
"People Are Freaking Out Because Prince Harry Closed His Own Car Door" I just can't. Bear in mind "people" is likely a synonym for "lazy-ass alleged journalists who can't be bothered to actually do anything other than collect beyond-idiotic clickbait". |
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Post by Albert Fish Taco on Sept 19, 2019 9:39:08 GMT -5
"People Are Freaking Out Because Prince Harry Closed His Own Car Door" I just can't. But did he slam the door loudly and repeatedly enough to wake up the neighbors? |
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Post by Dr. Rumak on Nov 24, 2019 19:34:54 GMT -5
“Doctor Saves Traveler's Life by Sucking Urine from Man's Bladder During Mid-Flight Emergency”
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Post by Prole Hole on Nov 25, 2019 8:45:13 GMT -5
“Doctor Saves Traveler's Life by Sucking Urine from Man's Bladder During Mid-Flight Emergency” Possible alternative headline: "Doctor Caught Giving Mid-Air Blowjob Finds Contrived Excuse To Explain It Away" |
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Post by Dr. Rumak on Dec 23, 2019 16:08:19 GMT -5
"An Ultramarathon Runner Puked So Hard He Tore Open His Esophagus"
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Post by Pastafarian on Jan 9, 2020 19:41:33 GMT -5
"Kim Kardashian Shows Off Her Ginormous Refrigerator. Envy Is Served."
None of this interests me. Plus I loathe the word "ginormous".
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Post by Dr. Rumak on Jan 11, 2020 19:24:35 GMT -5
"Batman Actor Burt Ward Claims ABC Gave Him Pills to Shrink His Superheroic Penis"
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Post by Pastafarian on Jan 18, 2020 14:42:59 GMT -5
"MLB Cheating Scandal Claims Another Manager as New Rumors of Astros Batters Wearing Buzzers Swirl"
I fell asleep halfway through reading this.
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Post by Albert Fish Taco on Feb 7, 2020 14:47:05 GMT -5
"Batman Actor Burt Ward Claims ABC Gave Him Pills to Shrink His Superheroic Penis" They also held colorful cardboard signs in front of his junk saying “Shrivel!!!” and “Deflate!!!” |
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Post by Pastafarian on Feb 20, 2020 11:13:17 GMT -5
"A Venn diagram to determine if you should watch Justin Bieber beatbox “Smelly Cat” from Friends"
Nope, nope, absolutely fucking not.
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Post by Pastafarian on Mar 3, 2020 9:56:07 GMT -5
"Millie Bobby Brown’s Adorable New Puppy Is The Complete Opposite Of A Demogorgon"
I hate you, headline writer.
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Post by Pastafarian on Mar 4, 2020 11:34:06 GMT -5
"The Latest Online Racist Pileup Is About Vaginal-Care Products at Target"
Of course it is.
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Post by Pastafarian on Mar 18, 2020 17:32:03 GMT -5
"Virus 'Challenge' Includes Licking Plane's Toilet Seat, Boomer Rant"
Fuck everything.
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Post by Pastafarian on Mar 19, 2020 14:22:59 GMT -5
"Coronavirus: Gal Gadot, Natalie Portman, Mark Ruffalo, Amy Adams and More Stars Sing "Imagine" "
I'm allergic to mawkishness, and really don't like that song, so I'm gonna pass.
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Post by Nudeviking on Mar 20, 2020 1:38:33 GMT -5
"Coronavirus: Gal Gadot, Natalie Portman, Mark Ruffalo, Amy Adams and More Stars Sing "Imagine" " I'm allergic to mawkishness, and really don't like that song, so I'm gonna pass. The only good thing to come of that was some twitter person with a blue check mark declaring that they were going to assemble their own crew of people to do the same thing with Wheatus' "Teenage Dirtbag," which I am 1004% in favor of happening. I think it was probably just a joke, but goddamn imagine a world where celebrities are doin' covers of goodass 90s alterna-rock one hit wonder songs on twitter to keep everyone sane in these our troubled times....it's easy if you try! |
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Post by Pastafarian on Mar 24, 2020 10:44:44 GMT -5
"Kim Kardashian Breaks Silence On Taylor Swift, Kanye Video: ‘She Is Actually Lying’ "
I *actually* don't give a fuck.
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Post by Dr. Rumak on Apr 3, 2020 7:09:30 GMT -5
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Post by Lurky McLurk on May 18, 2020 5:05:50 GMT -5
Anything beginning "Watch Dr. Pimple Popper"
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Post by Pastafarian on Jun 25, 2020 8:59:13 GMT -5
"Leech swims up man's penis, drinks pint of blood before docs pull it out"
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Trurl
Shoutbox Elitist 
Posts: 7,693
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Post by Trurl on Aug 20, 2020 19:05:21 GMT -5
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Post by Dr. Rumak on Sept 1, 2020 20:49:32 GMT -5
"Watch a Nurse Pull a Four-Foot Snake Out of a Woman's Throat"
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Crash Test Dumbass
AV Clubber 
ffc what now
Posts: 7,058
Gender (additional): mostly snacks
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Post by Crash Test Dumbass on Oct 14, 2020 9:31:28 GMT -5
"Only William Barr stands between Trump and the end of democracy"
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Post by Dr. Rumak on Oct 15, 2020 19:04:23 GMT -5
"How to watch Trump and Biden’s dueling town halls on Thursday"
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Post by Dr. Rumak on Oct 22, 2020 11:20:50 GMT -5
"Matthew McConaughey Shared How A Wet Dream Led Him To Marry Camila Alves".
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Post by Nudeviking on Oct 23, 2020 3:17:35 GMT -5
"Matthew McConaughey Shared How A Wet Dream Led Him To Marry Camila Alves". Is the explanation just, "So I jizzed in my sleep after seeing her and then realized I'm Matthew McConaughey and could probably hook up with her in real life based on the fact that I'm Matthew McConaughey so I went for it. One thing lead to another and now we're happily married?" |
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Post by Dr. Rumak on Oct 23, 2020 6:12:37 GMT -5
"Matthew McConaughey Shared How A Wet Dream Led Him To Marry Camila Alves". Is the explanation just, "So I jizzed in my sleep after seeing her and then realized I'm Matthew McConaughey and could probably hook up with her in real life based on the fact that I'm Matthew McConaughey so I went for it. One thing lead to another and now we're happily married?" I don't know. I didn't click on the headline. |
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Post by Pastafarian on Oct 26, 2020 13:54:37 GMT -5
"Barrett Set to Be Confirmed to the Supreme Court"
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Post by Pastafarian on Oct 27, 2020 16:16:49 GMT -5
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