fab
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Post by fab on Sept 6, 2017 13:23:33 GMT -5
Seeing as I just ate some weird abomination known as "Firework Oreos" that a coworker brought in, I figured this might be a fun thread to have. "Firework Oreos" are basically regular Oreos with red and blue Pop Rocks candy embedded in the icing.  You can't just lick the icing to get them to pop, they have to hit the back of your throat first or something. (inb4 inevitable "that's what she said" hacky joke.) Now I wonder if they'll react weirdly with milk. Apparently said coworker also found Cotton Candy Twinkies somehow. I have no idea where she finds this shit, but I am sometimes that sucker who'll try a new menu item or terrible variant of candy bar only to find that -- unsurprisingly -- it's often far worse and exists solely as a marketing / brand awareness exercise. I get kinda annoyed when an actual good variant comes out and I can't buy it in quantity. I asked the people who make Mars if I could buy a few cases of the old Rocky Road formula off them after I worked at a gas station and we had them in stock, but I was told they wouldn't sell to anyone without a retail license. Sigh. |
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LazBro
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Post by LazBro on Sept 6, 2017 13:36:09 GMT -5
Oh man, there could be a whole thread just on deviant Oreos! Submitted without further comment, this shocking discovery captured last night in the field:  |
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Post by Pastafarian on Sept 6, 2017 18:28:32 GMT -5
I recently tried the "Cinnamon Bun Oreos". They were like Golden Oreos with cream cheese filling and a touch, just the faintest whisper, of cinnamon. They needed way more cinnamon. I don't think I'd buy them again.  |
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Post by Nudeviking on Sept 6, 2017 18:59:36 GMT -5
This bullshit is why America is the shithole it is today. HYDROX 4 LIFE!!!
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fab
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Post by fab on Sept 8, 2017 6:21:06 GMT -5
We don't have Hydrox here, so I have no way of verifying if this is any good. I overheard the coworker who somehow scrounges these weird variants up asking another one if she would be willing to try this:  "Artificially Flavored?" YOU DON'T SAY. |
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fab
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Post by fab on Sept 8, 2017 6:22:26 GMT -5
Oh man, there could be a whole thread just on deviant Oreos! Submitted without further comment, this shocking discovery captured last night in the field:  |
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Crash Test Dumbass
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Post by Crash Test Dumbass on Sept 8, 2017 20:30:03 GMT -5
spotted at target:    I didn't try any of them. The only ones I even find almost appealing are the cookies & cream ones, but white chocolate is NOT chocolate. |
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Liz n Dick
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Post by Liz n Dick on Sept 9, 2017 13:00:01 GMT -5
There is nothing -- NOTHING -- that could get me to try "White Pumpkin Pie" M&Ms. I would even eat Peeps Oreos again (!!!!!!!!!! Yeah, I said it! "Again"!) before I'd try that crime against nature. White M&Ms would be an atrocity. Pumpkin Pie M&Ms would be an atrocity. Put them together? I worry the negative power of that vile pairing could be enough to permanently damage the fabric of the universe.
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Post by ๐ huss ๐ on Sept 9, 2017 14:08:31 GMT -5
This bullshit is why America is the shithole it is today. HYDROX 4 LIFE!!!  |
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Post by Ron Howard Voice on Sept 11, 2017 10:22:13 GMT -5
I've never had Hydrox. Hoping a store nearby will start carrying them so I can see what all the hoopla is about.
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Post by Liz n Dick on Sept 11, 2017 12:36:47 GMT -5
I've never liked Oreos, but even with that as the baseline I always thought Hydrox were awful in comparison. I mean, clearly I've got some Oreo-type cookie taste-receptor issues, but still. The Hydrox love confuses me.
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Baron von Costume
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Post by Baron von Costume on Sept 12, 2017 13:08:12 GMT -5
People just love a cookie that sounds like a cleaning solution I guess.
A friend just sent me a package of the firework oreos as part of a culinary secret santa thing but I haven't tried them yet.
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fab
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Post by fab on Sept 12, 2017 15:13:37 GMT -5
I didn't try any of them. The only ones I even find almost appealing are the cookies & cream ones, but white chocolate is NOT chocolate. yeah, those are the only ones I'd try. and good god, candy corn? I don't know anyone who likes candy corn... |
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Post by Liz n Dick on Sept 13, 2017 8:38:57 GMT -5
yeah, those are the only ones I'd try. and good god, candy corn? I don't know anyone who likes candy corn... My mother and sister love candy corn. This time of year is so awful for me, because they get all excited about the arrival of candy corn on the scene, and they have special candy treats they get to enjoy, and I get nothing... because I have taste buds. (For the record, Hugs prefers pumpkin cremes to candy corn, but it's all the same.) Oh, and for the further record, my mother is also the only person on earth who likes circus peanuts. I don't understand her at all. |
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Post by Incense on Sept 13, 2017 8:59:41 GMT -5
yeah, those are the only ones I'd try. and good god, candy corn? I don't know anyone who likes candy corn... My mother and sister love candy corn. This time of year is so awful for me, because they get all excited about the arrival of candy corn on the scene, and they have special candy treats they get to enjoy, and I get nothing... because I have taste buds. (For the record, Hugs prefers pumpkin cremes to candy corn, but it's all the same.) Oh, and for the further record, my mother is also the only person on earth who likes circus peanuts. I don't understand her at all. I'll be honest; I don't mind candy corn in general, though I don't love it. And I liked those M&M candy corns ones just fine last year. (They were the last thing, unsurprisingly, in the work snack drawer last fall, and desperate for candy, I tried them and rather liked them.) I like the mallowcreme pumpkins, too. But circus peanuts. Ugh. |
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fab
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Post by fab on Sept 13, 2017 14:45:45 GMT -5
my mother is also the only person on earth who likes circus peanuts. ย I don't understand her at all. are those the ones with the shells on? seems fairly pointless compared to preshucked peanuts. |
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Crash Test Dumbass
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Post by Crash Test Dumbass on Sept 13, 2017 14:51:50 GMT -5
my mother is also the only person on earth who likes circus peanuts. I don't understand her at all. are those the ones with the shells on? seems fairly pointless compared to preshucked peanuts. No, the weird marshmallowesque things, although I understand there are some deep-fried peanuts that you can consume while still in the shell (the peanut, that is, not (necessarily) you). |
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Post by Liz n Dick on Sept 13, 2017 15:07:00 GMT -5
my mother is also the only person on earth who likes circus peanuts. I don't understand her at all. are those the ones with the shells on? seems fairly pointless compared to preshucked peanuts. Like Crash Test Dumbass said, circus peanuts are those stale orange marshmallow things. Boomer just adores stale marshmallows. ::shudder:: I make them for us during hot cocoa season, and use a recipe that yields an absurdly large batch. Hugs and I have to keep an eagle eye on the big bin of marshmallows, then, to ensure that Boomer doesn't "accidentally" leave the top ajar, thereby staling them up. She's a monster. As for the in-shell peanuts, I have no idea why anyone eats those. They give me flashbacks to having terminal swamp-ass while watching baseball games at Veterans Stadium in Philly, covered head to toe with pulverized bits of peanut shell as I spend several excruciating hours having to wrench open the shells to get to the bland nutmeats inside as my only form of entertainment to distract me from the fact that I'm at a baseball game. |
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fab
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Post by fab on Sept 14, 2017 6:23:55 GMT -5
yeah, fuck those things. I forgot what they were, aside from table. clearly, I repressed it. I'll throw Lego candy as something that is way cooler in concept than reality... I'm sure it doesn't have the approval of the Lego brand. the stupid things don't stack and they're like a way harder, crappier version of PEZ candy. anyway, I'm barely awake, but a buddy in the midwest mentioned the other day that these are his favourite novelty Oreos:  I think it had something to do with the hint of cinnamon, and them maybe being more like super half-assed apple butter sandwich cookies? I haven't tried them, so I can't say. I'm gonna have a chat with Sheila later today and ask where the fuck she finds the weird novelty foods. maybe she can be my dealer. I'll tell her it's for science and the greater good. |
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Post by LazBro on Sept 14, 2017 8:10:06 GMT -5
This is not my picture, but you can be assured that this product is in my home at this very moment, and I am enjoying it with my coffee as I type:  |
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Post by Incense on Sept 14, 2017 8:17:27 GMT -5
!!!!! Those are going on next week's grocery list.
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Post by LazBro on Sept 14, 2017 8:21:08 GMT -5
!!!!! Those are going on next week's grocery list. I hope you can find them. These novelty oreos come and go quickly, and I think some are store exclusives. So, like, my Kroger has a peanut butter and jelly version that I think is only available at Kroger. ETA: What I should have said was, maybe do some research first in case they're only available in a specific store. |
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fab
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Post by fab on Sept 14, 2017 8:30:30 GMT -5
!!!!! Those are going on next week's grocery list. the graham cracker style cookies seem like a really good choice. if I can find them up here, I'll definitely take a swing at this. in related novelty flavours, I'm pretty sure there are a stupid number of Kit Kat variants available (it has its own shop in Japan with an absurd variety?), but here there are maybe a handful that are fairly easy to acquire.  The green tea ones are pretty good, albeit super synthetic. pretty much all of these weird food science abominations are, anyhow. I should also pay respects to what is actually the original subconscious inspiration for this thread: behold, the Snickers Rocky Road bar.  THIS MOTHERFUCKER. I actually contacted whoever makes them and tried to buy a case, since I didn't want to pay the absurd markup repeatedly at the gas station I worked at back then. they wouldn't sell me any in bulk because I don't have a retail license for distribution... fuckers. I mean, they call it Rockin' Nut Road which doesn't jive with my memory -- I thought it was just Rocky Road. the packaging was definitely different. I really like the "Dark" chocolate variants of old standbys like Mars and Snickers. Snickers fucking killed it with that version, and even though they brought it back, I'm not sure it's the exact same? so yeah. candy bar companies, DO MORE OF THAT. SRSLY. you can mask the super low cocoa content and weird emulsifiers the whole sugar / salt / death combo if tactfully executed. know thine enemy. Sun Tzu that shit already. |
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Post by Ben Grimm on Sept 14, 2017 9:04:10 GMT -5
yeah, those are the only ones I'd try. and good god, candy corn? I don't know anyone who likes candy corn... My mother and sister love candy corn. This time of year is so awful for me, because they get all excited about the arrival of candy corn on the scene, and they have special candy treats they get to enjoy, and I get nothing... because I have taste buds. (For the record, Hugs prefers pumpkin cremes to candy corn, but it's all the same.) Oh, and for the further record, my mother is also the only person on earth who likes circus peanuts. I don't understand her at all. My wife loves candy corn. She can't keep it at home or in her office because she can't stay out of it. |
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Baron von Costume
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Post by Baron von Costume on Sept 14, 2017 9:20:53 GMT -5
Since I took a quick trip across the border yesterday I stocked up on some wacky cookies including the cinn-bun oreos and some pb oreos, some red velvet chips ahoy that are probably terrible but my mom is bonkers for red velvet as well as some of my favourite us only chips. Not gonna lie, for a day trip I sure brought back a lot of cheese and junk food  60 some dollars worth. |
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Post by Liz n Dick on Sept 14, 2017 9:22:25 GMT -5
My wife loves candy corn. She can't keep it at home or in her office because she can't stay out of it. Yeah, a few years ago Hugs had to issue a "one bag per season" edict about the pumpkin cremes. Because she will just hoover up any she can find. It's always a sensitive science for her, determining when, exactly, in the season is the right time to have her single bag. As for this talk of the dark versions of standard candy bars, YES, A MILLION TIMES YES! The ones I really love are the bite-sized Milky Way Darks, which we now can't seem to find anywhere. Those are heavenly. |
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Post by Incense on Sept 14, 2017 10:22:05 GMT -5
My wife loves candy corn. She can't keep it at home or in her office because she can't stay out of it. Yeah, a few years ago Hugs had to issue a "one bag per season" edict about the pumpkin cremes. Because she will just hoover up any she can find. It's always a sensitive science for her, determining when, exactly, in the season is the right time to have her single bag. As for this talk of the dark versions of standard candy bars, YES, A MILLION TIMES YES! The ones I really love are the bite-sized Milky Way Darks, which we now can't seem to find anywhere. Those are heavenly. Oh hell yes, Milky Way Midnights. |
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fab
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Post by fab on Sept 15, 2017 7:58:45 GMT -5
My wife loves candy corn. She can't keep it at home or in her office because she can't stay out of it. Yeah, a few years ago Hugs had to issue a "one bag per season" edict about the pumpkin cremes. Because she will just hoover up any she can find. It's always a sensitive science for her, determining when, exactly, in the season is the right time to have her single bag. As for this talk of the dark versions of standard candy bars, YES, A MILLION TIMES YES! The ones I really love are the bite-sized Milky Way Darks, which we now can't seem to find anywhere. Those are heavenly. I find it hilarious how some companies manage to fuck up the dark versions of their bars. Nestle dark versions tend to taste like super mediocre dark chocolate and are often inferior to their non-dark original formulas, which isn't all that surprising, given that their bars are generally subpar compared to the offerings of other brands. maybe I'm just assuming they're all really crappy like the dark Aero bar though, which tastes like the most half-assed riff possible on a Lindt 70% bar, but with bubbles and branding. if some mad scientist could come up with an awesome dark variant of a Wunderbar that was more consistent in general shelf life and chewability, I'd be on cloud nine. |
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Crash Test Dumbass
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Post by Crash Test Dumbass on Sept 15, 2017 9:54:02 GMT -5
!!!!! Those are going on next week's grocery list. I hope you can find them. These novelty oreos come and go quickly, and I think some are store exclusives. So, like, my Kroger has a peanut butter and jelly version that I think is only available at Kroger. ETA: What I should have said was, maybe do some research first in case they're only available in a specific store. Supposedly they're available at Target, and I know Tim Tams are definitely available there. I'm just not sure whether to go to Target now and get some cookies or stay far away before I buy every cookie in sight. |
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fab
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Post by fab on Sept 15, 2017 12:11:33 GMT -5
just had a couple of these bad boys, which apparently we don't have in Canada, but a coworker brought them from the US? (no idea.)  I thought these would be kinda gross, but I may actually prefer them to the glory that is a regular Twinkie -- something I don't think I'd even tried til within the last year or two. if I could get these easily, I'd prolly buy a box once in a blue moon. it kinda tastes like the idea of cotton candy in paste form, which is way less gross than I'm phrasing it. it's good! |
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60 some dollars worth.