oppy all along
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Who's been messing up everything? It was oppy all along
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Post by oppy all along on Nov 25, 2017 8:38:13 GMT -5
Chapter 12A: Anthrax's Creed: OriginsFiller episodes are as popular as video game references are timeless. Also, the only episode so far to feature swearing. Things had certainly become lively in Caroline's home. Ever since her daughter had returned - tired, covered in dirt and twigs, and sporting three Hoenn League Gym Badges - her Pokémon could be found roaming in or around Littleroot Town. There was already a window which needed to be replaced after a mishap with John Seeda, Lonzo, and 'sock-er'. Oprah herself could often be found sleeping like a log. A few days in, Oprah had managed to pull herself out of bed and go for a training session with those of her Pokémon who were inclined to do such things. In a pleasant change of pace for Oprah's mother nothing was at risk of breaking, and she could lounge in front of the television without worrying. Ham Lincoln was rarely any trouble, his usual behaviour was to find a sunny spot in the lounge room and start meditating. (He'd never admit it, but he'd become an avid fan of daytime television.) Meanwhile Anthrax was poking around the kitchen, looking for things to ferret away and take back to the nest she'd established on the roof. "Hey! An-... Anthro-... why did my daughter choose such weird names for her Pokémon? Bug chick!" Anthrax turned to face Caroline, clearly thrilled about her new appellation 'bug chick'. "Can you get me a beer from the fridge?"Pokémon understood human languages spoken regularly around them pretty well. However, they often require context for words and context that don't apply to life in the wild. So there's the potential for misunderstandings. <What's a fridge?><A symbol of Pokémon oppression.> Ham Lincoln chimed in, his eyes still closed. Anthrax rolled her eyes. "Can you open the door to the big white thing and get me one of- nevermind I'll get it myself." She walked to the fridge and showed Anthrax what she was referring to. "So, in future, when I ask you to get me a beer?" In answer, Anthrax flew up to the shelf and grabbed a can of beer. "Nice. Hey, maybe having you guys around the house isn't so bad after all."<Fascist.>Anthrax tittered, pleased. Heh, titter. Caroline continued on. "Hey, come and watch some TV with me. I'll pour you a shot to try." She paused. "Don't tell my daughter about this. This is a show called The Boldore and the Beautiful, it's about a family who runs a fashion house for Pokémon. Also for some reason one of the main characters is a talking Boldore."Bouldershevik the talking Marxist Boldore is by far the most popular character of the show. "Here, try this." Caroline said, offering Anthrax a shot glass. Anthrax took a tentative sip of her beer and made a funny face in surprise. Caroline laughed and went to take the glass back, but Anthrax possessively moved the glass out of reach and took another sip. Caroline laughed again and took a swig of her beer. Caroline and Anthrax settled on the couch with their beverages. "So, I heard you walked up to my daughter and jumped into a Poké ball. How'd that happen? It's been a while since I travelled, but I don't remember Pokémon ever doing that." Caroline wasn't expecting an answer, but cue the flashback music anyway. (-----) Anthrax looked into the middle distance, reminiscing about home. <I grew up in a large hive of Volbeat and Illumise. It was a good upbringing. The thing about us is Volbeat and Illumise are crazy about each other, it's just the way we are. I was the same.>Ham Lincoln was paying close attention, though he tried to make it seem otherwise. <Was?><Yeah. It all started when I met the Volbeat who I thought was going to be my life partner.> Anthrax sighed. <He was handsome, and charming, and vivid. My family thought he was great, and I loved him so much.><What happened?>Anthrax laughed bitterly. <Relationships age. The glow died, I moved back in with my parents, and he met another Illumise. She loved him so much as well.>Ham Lincoln had given up all pretence of meditating. <He did? What did you do then?><I challenged her to a battle of course.> Anthrax smirked. <And won. Easily><I thought you didn't like battling?> Ham Lincoln questioned. <I don't. Doesn't mean I can't.>Anthrax, certified badarse. <The funny thing is, me beating her up made him want me back. He said the battle reminded him of the passion in our relationship and was determined to win me back at any cost. The only problem was, I didn't want him back. The other Illumise and Volbeat weren't any help, they thought the whole thing was super romantic. We're weird like that. So I decided I had to get out of there.><Was that hard?>Anthrax shrugged. <Eh. Volbeat and Illumise leave the hive all the time. The world is much bigger than our forest in Route 117. It wasn't a big deal.>Ham Lincoln was sceptical. <I'm Psychic, remember?><Fine, it was hard, but... it was time for me to go, lay down a nest somewhere else. Maybe I'll go back someday, but I like it here. With older human, and this strange nectar she calls 'beer', and I just realised that even though I've been answering her question she has no idea what I'm saying.><Nope.>Oprah's mother had been politely letting the two talk while watching her show, because she's nice. Also because she has beer to keep her company. She took a swig, and noticed that the two Pokémon had stopped talking and were looking at her. "Yeah, we don't speak the same language. I'm glad you two have been keeping my daughter safe though."<How do I explain it to older human?>Ham Lincoln rolled his eyes. <From what I understand of their human narratives, this blonde human on the television exhibits similar traits to your former Volbeat.>Anthrax pointed and chirped at the blonde character when he appeared on the screen. "That's Chad, you shouldn't like him. He's a total fuckboy." A lightbulb appeared over her head. "Oh! You left to get away from a fuckboy!"<Nod yes,> Ham Lincoln instructed. Anthrax nodded. "Fair call. Nobody has time for a fuckboy." Caroline clinked beer-receptacles with Anthrax. "Hey, you've finished yours already. I'll buy you a sippy cup or something at the shops later. Let me get you a refill."Anthrax had a question for Ham Lincoln as Caroline went to the kitchen. <Ham, you know human culture right?><I have observed many things through this television and am now an expert on the things humans do and why, yes.> Ham Lincoln answered snootily. <What's a fuckboy?>Pictured, a fuckboy. PartyMudbutt (Marshtomp), M, Level 25, Water/Ground, Bold, Likes to run John Seeda (Nuzleaf), M, Level 23, Grass/Dark, Hasty, Somewhat vain Ham Lincoln (Kadabra), M, Level 23, Psychic, Sassy, Somewhat vain Meowth (Skitty), F, Level 22, Normal, Sassy, Mischievous Lonzo (Voltorb), Level 22, Electric, Lonely, Takes plenty of siestas Anthrax (Illumise), F, Level 22, Bug, Bold, Alert to sounds Audience ParticipationThat's one filler chapter in the books. Is there anyone else you're interested in reading about?
... no, Oprah will not at any point in her adventure capture Bouldershevik the talking Marxist Boldore and make him a member of the party.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Nov 25, 2017 11:44:17 GMT -5
Caroline is a bad influence on these Pokemon.
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oppy all along
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Who's been messing up everything? It was oppy all along
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Post by oppy all along on Nov 25, 2017 20:15:05 GMT -5
Caroline is a bad influence on these Pokemon. There are definitely Pokemon narcotics in the seedy underbelly of the Pokemon world.
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Post by Deleted on Nov 25, 2017 21:24:03 GMT -5
Ham Lincoln
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oppy all along
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Who's been messing up everything? It was oppy all along
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Post by oppy all along on Nov 29, 2017 21:50:59 GMT -5
Chapter 12B: Ham Lincoln the LiberatorOur internet's out. It's been a week since I watched a YouTube video to completion. Send help.This is the story of how one Kadabra became a legend. Ham Lincoln woke early that morning. The sun was just peeking over the trees in Littleroot Town. His fellow party members were still asleep. Some of the party slept in their Poké balls, others around the house. Meowth could be found taking up more than her fair share of Oprah's bed, Mudbutt had taken residence in a kiddie pool in the backyard he and Oprah had filled with mud. Ham Lincoln himself spent as little time in his Poké ball as possible, preferring instead to levitate in odd parts of the house. (He was very unhappy the morning he woke up to find a blanket over his head.) He had often found himself... conflicted, lately. Ham Lincoln was an ardent advocate for Pokémon freedom and Pokémon rights. Yet, most of the Pokémon he talked to expressed contentment with their ownership. And if he was being honest, he couldn't deny the perks of his life in Oprah's party. As much as it rankled him to think of himself as having a trainer, she frequently said nice things to him and fed him enjoyable treats. But that was part of the cruel deceit... right? There wasn't much to do around the house at this hour. Ham Lincoln Teleported to the living room where Caroline often put out treats only to find an empty plate. Someone had clearly helped themselves to a midnight snack. Grumbling, Ham Lincoln instead went to the fridge. Fine, he'll eat a chocolate bar for breakfast then! Like an animal! It wasn't easy being a hero. Trivia time, 'Pokémon treats' are a baked doughy good traditionally made for Pokémon but also edible for human consumption. While commonly sweet, they can come with a variety of ingredients and flavours. Some of them are popular among humans, others are... not. Oprah's been trying to learn how to bake Pokémon treats lately, but the only one who seemed to like her cooking was Mudbutt. And frankly he was humouring her. Ham Lincoln went outside. Littleroot was a quiet town, and Oprah's Pokémon were typically free to roam unhindered. Ham Lincoln enjoyed exploring before things got busy and the his stories came on television. The man who lived a few doors down was going for a run with his Growlithe, and the bakers in the bakery were at work getting their stock ready. Ham Lincoln had taken some things from Oprah's bag called 'money' and exchanged them for Pokémon treats, once. That was a good morning. Suddenly, a scream pierced the air. Kadabra arrived on the scene instantly - Teleport is a very convenient move - and saw Professor Birch! Hail Birch. In a suspiciously familiar scene (though not to Ham Lincoln), Professor Birch was cowering from a growling Poochyena, three Poké balls laid out nearby. A youngster, also hearing the scream, ran to the scene. He stared agape, seeing Professor Birch, Poochyena, and a random Kadabra standing nearby. "You there! Help me! You'll need to grab a Poké ball and-""DAAAAAAAAAD DAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAD!" The youngster ran off. "Well, they can't all be trainers, I guess." Professor Birch sighed and dusted himself off. "Run along, Poochyena. You too Kadabra." Professor Birch packed up his things and trudged off. Ham Lincoln was confused. <What the hell was that?><The dude does this stunt to give new kids Pokémon. Gives me a Pokémon treat to chase him and look angry, and then run off when the kid picks a Pokémon.> Poochyena explained. <It's demeaning, but the treats are nice.>
Ham Lincoln was now angry. <You shouldn't put up with this. There are other, better ways to get treats! Also it's disrespectful.><...how else do you get treats?>Later that morning, Ham Lincoln and Poochyena showed up at the bakery, with more of what Oprah called 'money' and angrily insisted that he shouldn't 'steal'. So many confusing human concepts. How was anyone supposed to make sense of it? But out of respect to her, Ham Lincoln waited until she left the room to take money from her bag. Because he's nice. "Back again are we?" The baker winked. "And you've brought a friend! Here, two Pokémon treats."Ham Lincoln and Poochyena ate their treats with relish. <mmmm, this is so good!> Poochyena exclaimed. <And you say I can get more of this with 'money'?><Indeed. All you need to do is take this coloured paper from the humans and give it to that other human, and you get treats.><Thank you so much! I'm going to tell all my friends about it!>Ham Lincoln bid Poochyena farewell, satisfied with his work that day. Poochyena quit Professor Birch's employ and indeed told all of his friends about how one could obtain delicious treats with 'money'. And ever since then, Littleroot Town has been besieged by a group of Poochyena who steal money from people and use it to buy Pokémon treats from the bakery. And Professor Birch has been unable to find a replacement to chase him around for minimal reward. Nobody knows for sure how the Poochyena Gang started, but among wild Pokémon a legend is whispered about a Kadabra. A Kadabra in captivity, but he travels far and wide under the nose of the humans, fighting for Pokémon rights and dignity and subverting the colonialist human agenda. And they call that Kadabra... Ham Lincoln. (-----) Ham Lincoln returned home, running into Oprah on the way in. "Hey, Ham. What'd you get up to today?"<Oh, not much.>She ruffled Ham's head. "Well whenever you're hungry Mom finished another batch of Pokémon treats. And your shows are about to start. Meowth took your spot by the window though."Ham Lincoln sighed. It's not easy being a hero. PartyMudbutt (Marshtomp), M, Level 25, Water/Ground, Bold, Likes to run John Seeda (Nuzleaf), M, Level 23, Grass/Dark, Hasty, Somewhat vain Ham Lincoln (Kadabra), M, Level 23, Psychic, Sassy, Somewhat vain Meowth (Skitty), F, Level 22, Normal, Sassy, Mischievous Lonzo (Voltorb), Level 22, Electric, Lonely, Takes plenty of siestas Anthrax (Illumise), F, Level 22, Bug, Bold, Alert to sounds Audience ParticipationAnd that's the tale of Ham Lincoln. I'm through the main campaign of Pokémon Ultra Moon, so it shouldn't be too long before regular oppyu vs Pokémon Omega Ruby resumes. Though I might write some more filler anyway, I like the stuff that isn't 'Oprah travelled to a place and followed the plot'.
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oppy all along
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Who's been messing up everything? It was oppy all along
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Post by oppy all along on Dec 6, 2017 8:14:28 GMT -5
Chapter 12C: The Littleroot Cross-Country Obstacle Course Challenge!It's the biggest event of the Summer. Or the Winter, for your North Hemisphereans. "Come one, come all, to the inaugural Littleroot Cross-Country Obstacle Course Challenge! Today, our fearless Pokémon contestants will risk life and limb to prove who is the best at running long distances and not falling over! I am your host, Oprah, standing here with my broadcast colleague Muddy Mudbutt Jr." There are no cameras or audience or anything. Oprah's just getting stir-crazy from being off the road for too long. <That's right folks!> Mudbutt's fine sleeping in mud all day. He is very indulgent of his strange human pet though. <Let me tell you more about the course! It contains an open-field running section leading to the forest which makes up the obstacle course section! Our contestants will follow a path marked out by stickers, navigating fallen logs, wild Pokémon, and some beautiful natural mud patches I might pay a visit to later. Back to you, human.>"You told the viewers at home about the course, right?" Mudbutt nodded. "Then lets meet our contestants for today!""John Seeda, the local Nuzleaf with a Dark typing but a heart of gold! He certainly has the home field advantage today, being from the forests around Littleroot Town" John Seeda puffed up his chest, swaggering to the imaginary audience. "What would you say he brings to the table, Muddy Mudbutt?"<One thing for certain is that he has a giant stupid-looking leaf on his head.> John Seeda shot Mudbutt a glare. Oprah did as well, sensing from context that Mudbutt was probably starting trouble again. <Er, but that doesn't detract from his agility and affinity for the forest!>"Next up is Lonzo! Hailing from the outskirts of Mauville City, this Pokémon brings a lot of spark!" Nobody knew where Lonzo found a pair of sunglasses, but they certainly weren't brave enough to try and take them from them. "They're lightning across the ground and will definitely pose a threat today!"<Yes, rolling across the floor will go great in a forest.> John Seeda smirked. John Seeda and Lonzo glared at each other. Usually best friends, the two had been unusually hostile to each other ever since... the incident. (-----) Anthrax, John Seeda, and Lonzo were watching a tv show about fishing or something. <You're both pretty good at backflips, right?> Anthrax asked. John Seeda and Lonzo nodded in agreement. <Well, who's the best?> <Me.> They answered in unison. Awkward pause. (-----) <YOU CAN'T EVEN CLIMB STAIRS!><YOUR BACKFLIPS ARE MEDIOCRE!>"Um... guys? I'm about to introduce the next contestant?" John Seeda and Lonzo resolutely continued glaring at each other. "I'll just go and do that, you two continue your staring contest.""And Meowth is racing as well, I guess."<I didn't think you'd be interested in this competition, Meowth.> Mudbutt observed drily as John Seeda and Lonzo were literally butting heads. <As a contest star I make a point of being the best at everything. Including whatever this is, I wasn't really paying attention.> As a contest star, Meowth also vogued as she talked now. It's important to stay in practice. <It's a race through the forest. The dirty, muddy, long forest.>Meowth paused. <Oh.>"CONTESTANTS ON THE LINE!" Oprah called out. "ON YOUR MARKS! GET SET! GO!" Mudbutt fired a stream of water into the air to signify the start of the race! John Seeda and Lonzo took off! Meowth did not. <Ah, the water is falling back down! It's getting in my fur!>"Meowth? The race has started." Meowth wasn't paying attention <Oh look, a Beautifly! I'm going to pounce on it and rip its wings off!> Meowth bounced off in the opposite direction of the race track. Mudbutt and Oprah exchanged a shrug. (-----) Lonzo and John Seeda began the Littleroot Cross-Country Obstacle Course Challenge in earnest. First there was a circuit around Littleroot Town, racing around buildings and through bemused townspeople used to seeing Oprah's Pokémon run amok. Despite John Seeda's best efforts, Lonzo was able to outspeed him and pull ahead. <THAT'S JUST BECAUSE YOU'RE A BALL!><YOUR MUM DIDN'T SEEM TO MIND MY BALLS LAST NIGHT!><THAT WAS UNCALLED FOR!>They came sprinting around back to where the race had started, passing Oprah and Mudbutt. <Hey look John Seeda's losing again.><SHUT UP MUDBUTT!>Next the course tracked into the forest. Lonzo still had the speed advantage, but Nuzleaf's legs enabled him to more easily traverse the uneven ground. Wooping, he passed Lonzo as he cartwheeled over a log that Lonzo had to roll around. <LOOK! I'M WINNING!>Lonzo fumed as they fell behind. Realising they had to try something else to keep up with John, they fortuitously spotted a tree root shaped conveniently like a ramp. Cue lightbulb, and... <WOOHOO!>John Seeda saw a flying Lonzo shoot through the air and land ahead of him! He responded to this shortcoming with sportsmanship and grace. Just kidding, he immediately started scheming about how to cheat. He saw Lonzo racing up another root and and had an idea. As Lonzo propelled themselves skyward once more, John Seeda used a Razor Leaf to blow Lonzo off-course and into the forest! John Seeda whistled innocently and continued the race, now seemingly without competitors. Can't trust a Dark type. (-----) It had been a while since John Seeda had seen hide or hair of Lonzo. Really, this was almost too easy. He almost wished something interesting would happen. And then, he saw a pile of Pokémon treats piled high just off the path. He inspected the pile suspiciously. Surely it was made by someone. But that someone couldn't be seen, and he was feeling a little peckish. Just like that story about the tortoise and the hare. The hare was way faster and everyone loved him, and he was rewarded for his coolness by being able to take a nap. Lonzo approached as well. They'd caught up partly through John Seeda slacking off after launching Lonzo into the woods, and partly through cutting across the circuit and taking a shortcut. Hey, John Seeda cheated first. As Lonzo approached from a different angle, the first thing they saw were the pack of Poochyena napping just out of John Seeda's sight. And they also saw John Seeda sneaking up on their Pokémon treat stash... Well, all's fair in love, war, and obstacle courses. Lonzo fired a slight electrical current into the Poochyena camp, just enough to wake a few of them up. <Hey, what was that?> A Poochyena stirred, looked around, and saw John Seeda in the middle of their camp reaching out to take their treats. Her eyes narrowed. <Um... hey, how about we just pretend-><EVERYONE WAKE UP! THIEF! THIEF!> The entire pack sprang awake and stared at the caught thief. John Seeda sprinted away, pursued by multiple angry Poochyena! Lonzo laughed to themself. Then they heard another Poochyena call out from behind them. <THE THIEF HAS A FRIEND! THIS BALL THING HERE!>Lonzo sighed. <Seriously, that's racially insens-> They noticed more growling Poochyena emerge from the shadows. <-okay I'm going bye>(-----) Wincing, Lonzo gingerly rolled out of the forest. It had been a rough time for them. So many teeth and claws. Oprah's eyes widened as she saw he was covered in dirt and bite marks. "Lonzo? What happened to-"<NOOOOOOOOOOOO> John Seeda came leaping out of the trees and crashed into Lonzo! <I WAS FIRST!><NO, ME!> The two beat up, scruffy Pokémon wrestled for position. "Um, guys? The line's over there." Oprah said, pointing at a line where Meowth was snoring loudly. Lonzo and John Seeda were stunned. Defeated, they sagged to the ground and lay in exhaustion. <Did Meowth seriously beat us?> John Seeda asked. Mudbutt shook his head. <Nah, she pissed off a Beautifly and ate a Sleep Powder. What in the love of Arceus happened to you two though?>John Seeda and Lonzo exchanged a look. John Seeda sighed. <I guess in the heat of competition, we forgot what was truly important.><Yeah.> Lonzo added. <Like not being eaten by wild Poochyena.><That explains nothing.>
John Seeda wrapped an arm around Lonzo. <The important thing is that we're friends again. And we require urgent medical assistance.>PartyMudbutt (Marshtomp), M, Level 25, Water/Ground, Bold, Likes to run John Seeda (Nuzleaf), M, Level 23, Grass/Dark, Hasty, Somewhat vain Ham Lincoln (Kadabra), M, Level 23, Psychic, Sassy, Somewhat vain Meowth (Skitty), F, Level 22, Normal, Sassy, Mischievous Lonzo (Voltorb), Level 22, Electric, Lonely, Takes plenty of siestas Anthrax (Illumise), F, Level 22, Bug, Bold, Alert to sounds
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oppy all along
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Who's been messing up everything? It was oppy all along
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Post by oppy all along on Dec 11, 2017 7:14:06 GMT -5
Chapter 12D: A Journey Resumed?Guys I finished Pokémon Ultra Moon it's really good.Caroline and Anthrax walked through the department store. Caroline pushed a trolley containing a mishmash of items - pans, glitter, a bag of rice, a DVD of Season 17 of The Boldore and the Beautiful - as Anthrax twittered around seeking new things to add to her nest on the roof. "Remember, this means you have to stop taking stuff from around the house." Caroline warned. Anthrax's nest had grown to quite the collection of trinkets, mostly taken from Caroline's possessions. Anthrax had even procured an umbrella to shelter her nest from the rain. The final straw was when Caroline awoke to find Anthrax trying to fly off with her bed pillows. <Oooooh, what about this one?> Anthrax had flown over to a selection of blankets which would be perfect for lining the nest with. "Just one, Antimony." Caroline sighed as Anthrax immediately flew to the most expensive blankets. "Not those ones."<Ham Lincoln told me the higher the numbers are the better they are.> "Can you not bankrupt me please Anthro? Besides, you might not get to use it long." Anthrax paused. "She's bored out of her mind at home. And Norman's planning on having a 'trainer to trainer' talk with her"<I want this one.> Anthrax said, carrying a particularly costly and fluffy blanket. (-----) The feud between Ham Lincoln and Meowth over the sunny spot in the lounge room had ended in a draw. Ham Lincoln levitated and meditated in the sunny spot, and Meowth relaxed on his head. Meowth was happier with the deal than Ham Lincoln. They were watching a rerun of one of their favourite shows, Pokémon Survivor. The star of this season was a shockingly conniving Jigglypuff. <Yes, our human talks about leaving often. I don't believe I'll go with her though> Ham Lincoln declared. <You want to stay here? Really?> Meowth asked incredulously. <You don't? I thought you wanted to live inside and watch television and eat human food.>Meowth shook her head. <I want to be a Contest star, remember? Not going to win any Contests in Littleroot Town. Time to get on the road.>Ham Lincoln frowned. <You enjoy parading yourself for the humans? You spend so much time training for that demeaning activity.><It's fun.> Meowth retorted. <And training also makes you awesome. Did you see when I totally beat up that Grovyle? I could never have done that before meeting Oprah.> <Well I don't see what's in it for me.> Ham Lincoln huffed. Meowth shifted so she was looking down at Ham Lincoln's eyes. <I want to be famous and I'm doing it. Don't you want to do something? Or did you just plan on sitting in this room and complaining all day.>Ham Lincoln refused to answer, but thought about what Meowth said. And negative things about Meowth, he thought those as well. (-----)
Lonzo and John Seeda were practising their tumbling in the backyard. It was agreed between them that Lonzo's backflips were more impressive, but since Lonzo needed John Seeda's help to launch into the backflips the backflip contest was a draw. They were training hard for the rematch though. <I think I'm going to go with human when she leaves.> Lonzo said. <Travelling is great for getting stronger and evolving.> John Seeda not too subtly drawing attention to his partially evolved form. <Don't you just evolve into a larger, angrier sphere though?><One, shut up, Electrode look awesome.> Lonzo retorted, but good-naturedly. <Two, I've been seeing those Poochyena around town lately.>John Seeda shivered. <Good point. We can practice our backflips on the road.><We should probably go inside now.><Good idea.>(-----) Norman was driving Oprah and Mudbutt home from their visit to Petalburg City. Yes, Hoenn has roads. You just can't see them in the game. Oprah was in the audience for a Gym battle between Norman and Wally, surprisingly. And Wally won! Since Wally's battle with Oprah a month ago, his Spronkles had evolved into a Kirlia and become badarse. "Wally's my rival and he's ahead of me now! Can we please have a Gym Battle?" Oprah implored her father. "As a Gym Leader I have total discretion to turn down challenges. So no." Norman replied firmly. "Why not?"Norman pulled the car to the side of the road, preparing for a Very Special Parenting Moment. "Oprah, are you serious about being a Pokémon trainer?""Yes, I am.""Wally is serious about being a Pokémon trainer. That young man has a fire within him, a fire that won't let him stop training and working until he's the very best. That's why he beat me today. How much training have you done in the last month? Have you had any battles since returning home?""I-..." Oprah trailed off. <Accept her Gym challenge and I'll show you how serious she is.> Mudbutt was sitting in the back and would not have his trainer browbeaten. Norman sighed. "I didn't mean to disrespect you or her, Marshtomp. You two could do amazing things.. But you're not doing yourselves any favours getting complacent at home. Wally certainly isn't sitting at home resting. If you're serious about being a Pokémon trainer - and I believe you are - you should leave Littleroot Town and continue the Gym challenge."
Oprah was silent. Mudbutt glared at Norman, who chuckled. "I'm glad your Pokémon stand up for you Oprah. You have three badges already. Come back with the Heat Badge from Lavaridge Town. The young lady who took over recently from her grandfather is very talented and determined, and will be a challenge."The Lavaridge Gym Leader is Flannery. This is to build anticipation for another gym battle which will be Mudbutt winning easily and singlehandedly. "Defeat her, and you'll be ready to take me on."(-----) Later that night, Oprah and Mudbutt sat in the living room. "Do you think Dad's right?"Mudbutt patted Oprah on the back. He had gotten better at doing that without accidentally pushing her over. <I'm with you, Oprah. Whatever you decide to do.>"Thanks, Mudbutt."<Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to sink into a nice pool of mud for the evening. Let me know if we're headed out.>As Mudbutt walked off, a familiar face knocked on the front door It's Brendan again! Brendan waved sheepishly. "I'm, ah, sorry about what I said before in Verdanturf. It was just... um...-""It's fine." Oprah cut him off. "It's good to see you again."Brendan grinned. "Um, hey, I'm just stopping in to show Dad some research, but I can stick around and hang out?""I'm actually headed out tomorrow." Oprah decided. "I want to visit the Gym in Lavaridge Town." "Great, me too!"And thus the team is reunited! (Brendan had no plans to visit the Gym in Lavaridge Town. He isn't even undertaking the Gym challenge.) PartyMudbutt (Marshtomp), M, Level 25, Water/Ground, Bold, Likes to run John Seeda (Nuzleaf), M, Level 23, Grass/Dark, Hasty, Somewhat vain Ham Lincoln (Kadabra), M, Level 23, Psychic, Sassy, Somewhat vain Meowth (Skitty), F, Level 22, Normal, Sassy, Mischievous Lonzo (Voltorb), Level 22, Electric, Lonely, Takes plenty of siestas Anthrax (Illumise), F, Level 22, Bug, Bold, Alert to sounds Audience ParticipationThis is back properly! Complete with new wild Pokémon to choose from! As before, please post your choice and a nickname up to 12 character for the Pokémon, and profanity is not allowed.1: Machop (Fighting) 2: Nosepass (Rock) 3: Numel (Fire/Ground) 4: Slugma (Fire) 5: Torkoal (Fire)
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Rainbow Rosa
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not gay, just colorful
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Post by Rainbow Rosa on Dec 11, 2017 11:08:19 GMT -5
A Numel named HumpUpTheJam
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Post by 🐍 huss 🐍 on Dec 11, 2017 13:31:37 GMT -5
A Slugma named Smegma
A Torkoal named Rod Torfulson's Armada featuring Herman Menderchuck
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Post by Deleted on Dec 11, 2017 13:56:46 GMT -5
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oppy all along
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Who's been messing up everything? It was oppy all along
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Post by oppy all along on Dec 11, 2017 19:50:49 GMT -5
A Slugma named Smegma A Torkoal named Rod Torfulson's Armada featuring Herman Menderchuck Now who's giving Pokémon body image problems?
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Post by Nudeviking on Dec 11, 2017 21:26:32 GMT -5
Nosepass named Triple H.
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Post by Roy Batty's Pet Dove on Dec 11, 2017 21:44:12 GMT -5
A Torkoal named Addison Mitchell McConnell Jr. Get it, because it's a turtle, and the US Senate Majority leader looks kind of like a shitty turtle, and I literally couldn't come up with anything more clever than that cheap political joke?
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oppy all along
TI Forumite
Who's been messing up everything? It was oppy all along
Posts: 2,767
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Post by oppy all along on Dec 11, 2017 22:47:17 GMT -5
A Torkoal named Addison Mitchell McConnell Jr. Get it, because it's a turtle, and the US Senate Majority leader looks kind of like a shitty turtle, and I literally couldn't come up with anything more clever than that cheap political joke? The important thing is that you tried your best
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oppy all along
TI Forumite
Who's been messing up everything? It was oppy all along
Posts: 2,767
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Post by oppy all along on Dec 28, 2017 19:51:54 GMT -5
Chapter 13: On the Road AgainFun fact: 15 years ago, Pokémon released a Christmas album. This actually happened.Who very soon will come our way? Santa very soon will come our way! Eight little Stantler pull his sleigh? Santa's little Stantler pull his sleigh!It was Christmas in Littleroot Town. Snow hung from the branches, and all around were filled with cheer. Oprah, Caroline, and Norman were enjoying Christmas dinner and talking Pokémon. Well, Oprah and Norman were talking Pokémon. Caroline was engrossed in a phone game where irascible Tailow fling themselves at loafing Grumpig. (Yup, a topical Angry Birds reference. On the eve of 2018.) Oprah's Pokémon and Norman's partner King Kawng were also mingling and enjoying their meal. Norman had raised King Kawng from a Slakoth, the first Pokémon Norman had ever received. King Kawng was Norman's most trusted partner and feared by Gym challengers far and wide. Many an aspiring Hoenn trainer had come up short against his power. Earlier today, Mudbutt had decided Christmas was an opportunity to antagonise a future opponent. It hadn’t gone well. (-----) Oprah and her family were enjoying a picnic lunch with Professor Elm's family. Mudbutt and Massko (Brendan’s Grovyle) were talking in hushed tones, sneaking glances at King Kawng as he scarfed down unattended leftovers. <I’m telling you Mudbutt, this is a bad- oh why do I bother.> Massko threw his hands up in the air as Mudbutt sauntered over to King Kawng. King Kawng paused between bites, taking in the smug Marshtomp approaching him. <Hey fatso. Eaten enough ye->King Kawng backhanded Mudbutt, sending him flying into a tree twenty metres away. Quiet fell over the picnic as everyone watched Mudbutt stagger out of a bush. John Seeda snickered. Norman raised an eyebrow. "King Kawng, was that really necessary?"<Yes.>"Okay then." Norman returned to munching on appetisers. (-----) Back to dinner, Norman and Oprah were still talking Pokémon. Caroline had left the table a while ago, announcing that Oprah and Norman were on dishes and she was going to lie down. “So yeah, Brendan and I are heading out in the next few days for Lavaridge Town. I'm looking forward to meeting more PokémonNorman smiled. “That’s good to hear. Have you thought about what you’ll do when you catch more Pokémon? You know you can only travel with six Pokémon. You already have a full party.”Oprah hadn’t thought about it. “So… what would I do with my other Pokémon?”“You could leave them with Professor Birch, I'm sure he has the resources to take good care of them. Or you could release some Pokémon back into the wild.”“Give up my Pokémon? Who would do that?” Oprah was aghast. Norman paused, considering his words. “It's not uncommon for Pokémon and their trainers to be together for a while, and then split up." Oprah was not less aghast at this. "They often end up wanting different things. You know Caroline travelled with Pokémon for a little while?”Oprah thought about it. “I’ve never seen her with any Pokémon.”“Well, she retired. She released most of her Pokémon into the wild. And Ziggy stays with me.”It’s Ziggy! Remember the Zigzagoon that Wally used to capture Spronkles? Same Zigzagoon, that’s canon now. "Mum just gave up her Pokémon? How could she do that? Didn't she love them?""She loved her Pokémon very much, Oprah." Norman said with a hint of reproach. "But she wanted to go one direction in life, and her Pokémon wanted to go in different directions. The same thing will likely happen to you and your party at some point. Not every Pokémon wants to travel and battle for a living."Oprah nodded slowly, still trying to digest the information. "Mum never talks about having Pokémon.""She prefers to keep it to herself. She's upstairs with Ziggy right now though." Norman noticed Oprah's expression. "No, you can't meet Ziggy right now. This is personal." Oprah deflated. “I'm not going to quit.” Oprah declared with a fire in her eyes. Norman grinned. “I believe you. You’ve already gone further in the Gym challenge than most trainers. Did you know you have a profile on the Pokémon League website?”“Really?! That’s so cool!”Norman brought up the website on his phone. Sure enough, there was a page showing Gym Challenger 'WINFREY, Oprah', and listing her successful Gym battles over Roxanne, Brawly, and Wattson. “The child of a Gym leader, winning three badges in such quick succession? You’re listed as one of the up and coming prospects in the Hoenn league. So is someone else I believe you're familiar with..” Norman brought up another profile; WONKA, Wally. It showed that he was on four badges, having defeated Roxanne, Brawly, and Wattson, as well as Norman. “If this young man is your rival, you’re going to have your work cut out for you.” (-----) It was a few days later. Norman had already returned to his Gym, and Oprah had resolved to resume her Pokémon journey. She was packed and ready to go, and next door Brendan was already saying his goodbyes to his parents. There was one last matter for Oprah to attend to.. Oprah had gathered her Pokémon in the living room. "Okay, so you know I'm leaving again to challenge more Gyms. It'll be a long trip, there's going to be a lot of battling, and it definitely won't be as comfortable as living here." Oprah had to pause for a second. “So, if you want to come with me, you can jump back in your Poké ball and we’ll be on our way. If you don’t… that’s fine as well. We'll figure something out.” Mudbutt immediately entered his Poké ball, quickly followed by John Seeda and Lonzo. Meowth took a moment to look at the couch before entering her Poké ball as well, leaving Anthrax and Ham Lincoln. Oprah took a deep breath. “Okay, what did you two want to do? You could stay with Professor Birch? Or be released back into the wild?”After some further consideration, Ham Lincoln sighed and returned to his Poké ball. Anthrax looked indecisive. “She can stay with me,” Caroline offered from the kitchen. Anthrax looked excited at that. “Are you sure it won’t be a problem?” Oprah worried. Caroline smiled. “It'll be nice to have some company around the house. And I'd hate for Anthrax to have to move her nest."“And you’re happy with that Anthrax?” Anthrax nodded. Oprah hugged the tiny bug Pokémon and her mother goodbye. “I’ll call to check up on you guys.”“It’ll be fine, honey. Go on and beat your father.” Oprah and Caroline hugged. It was certainly a warmer farewell than the first time. Tearing up just a little bit, Oprah met up with Brendan and they went on their way to conquer the Hoenn league. Caroline sighed as she watched Oprah leave again. “Fetch the brandy, Anthem. I’ll fill up the sippy cup for you.”Anthrax has left the active party. I’m sure she’ll be fine though. Alcohol isn’t harmful to Pokémon, right? (-----) Oprah and Brendan had made good time. They returned through Rusturf Tunnel which John Seeda had opened, which had in the meantime become a well-travelled thoroughfare - "Yeah, this is way quicker than going the long way around. Your John Seeda made life in Hoenn much easier." "But how was he the only Pokémon or person in Hoenn to think of clearing the tunnel by breaking the rocks in the way?" *shrugs* - then heading north from Mauville City. They were on Route 112, a valley path with imposing cliffs on either side. Brendan looked up nervously. "I'm always scared there's going to be a landslide walking through here." "I'm sure it's- AHHHHHHHHHH!" A large rock fell a small distance away from them. Oprah and Brendan looked up fearfully to see a smirking Machop standing atop a ridge. <I challenge you to a battle!> He shouted. Of course, the humans didn’t speak Pokémon, but he made his point pretty clearly with the boulder. "ARE YOU INSANE! WE THOUGHT WE WERE GOING TO DIE!" Oprah shouted angrily. The wild Machop seemed unfazed. Brendan was lying on the ground and hyperventilating, so Oprah decided she better take care of this. “Lonzo, I choose you!” The Machop leaped from his peak with a Karate Chop! Lonzo remained still as Machop came down. Despite having plenty of time to dodge, Lonzo braced themself and allowed Machop to hit with a furious gravity-assisted Karate Chop! Lonzo was knocked back from the force of the blow and winced in pain. Machop went to attack again, but found himself struggling to move! Lonzo's Static ability had paralysed Machop after he had come into contact with them! “Now, Lonzo, use Electro Ball!” Lonzo launched a powerful electric attack at the slowed Machop who couldn't dodge. It hit hard and knocked the wild Machop off his feet. He struggled to return to his feet, and Oprah threw a Poké ball! It wobbled back and forth, until… Oprah caught Chopotkin! After healing Lonzo, Oprah summoned the freshly captured Machop from his new home. He was a little worse for wear, but gratefully accepted the berries Oprah gave him to heal his paralysis and heal him a bit. After Machop (and Brendan) had recovered from the battle, Oprah pointed her Pokédex at the new addition to the team. “Machop. The Superpower Pokémon. Machop's muscles are special—they never get sore no matter how much they are used in exercise. This Pokémon has sufficient power to hurl a hundred adult humans.” Chopotkin flexed a bicep. “Oprah? Please don’t make Chopotkin hurl me.”“No promises.” Oprah and Chopotkin grinned. (-----) Oprah and Brendan arrived at the cable car that would take them to the top of Mount Chimney, from where they could travel down Jagged Pass and arrive at Lavaridge Town. However, a group of Team Magma grunts blocked their path. “Hey! The cable car is broken! Buzz off!” Behind them, a cable car full of Team Magma grunts headed up the mountain. “It seems like it’s working fine.” Oprah pointed out. “Well, it ain’t. And if you stick around broken machinery you might get yourselves hurt.” The Team Magma grunt said this in a way which seemed to threaten more than machinery failures. "Look, it'll be fixed in a couple weeks. Come back then."Deciding discretion was the better part of valour, Brendan and Oprah didn't push the matter and walked away. “Is there any other way to Lavaridge Town?” Oprah asked Brendan. Brendan shook his head. “Nope.”“The only way to Lavaridge Town is to take a cable car up a mountain and then climb down the mountain?” Oprah asked incredulously. “Unless you have a helicopter, yeah. The infrastructure sucks here.”Oprah was frustrated. “Well, what can we do?”“Well, we can go through Fiery Path, that’s nearby. From there we can reach Fallarbor Town, and we can also let the cops know what’s going on.”Oprah rubbed her forehead. “Fine, let’s do that.”“There’s also a contest hall there.” Brendan added Meowth jumped out of her Poké ball at the mention of 'contest'. <A contest hall?! Let’s go let’s go let’s go!>PartyActiveMudbutt (Marshtomp), M, Level 27, Water/Ground, Bold, Likes to run John Seeda (Nuzleaf), M, Level 24, Grass/Dark, Hasty, Somewhat vain Meowth (Skitty), F, Level 24, Normal, Sassy, Mischievous Ham Lincoln (Kadabra), M, Level 24, Psychic, Sassy, Somewhat vain Lonzo (Voltorb), Level 24, Electric, Lonely, Takes plenty of siestas Chopotkin (Machop), M, Level 16, Fighting, Jolly, Mischievous BenchAnthrax (Illumise), F, Level 22, Bug, Bold, Alert to sounds Audience ParticipationHappy holidays! New, somewhat late update, new Pokémon to choose from. Remember, please choose a Pokémon and a nickname (12 character or less, no profanity), or post your support for someone else's choice.1: Grimer (Poison) 2: Koffing (Poison) 3: Sandshrew (Ground) 4: Skarmory (Steel/Flying) 5: Spinda (Normal)
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Rainbow Rosa
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not gay, just colorful
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Post by Rainbow Rosa on Dec 28, 2017 20:12:07 GMT -5
Skarmory named Iron Eagle
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Post by 🐍 huss 🐍 on Dec 28, 2017 20:16:31 GMT -5
A Sandshrew named Feminism.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Dec 28, 2017 20:17:28 GMT -5
I like how Oprah and Wally's canon names are "Oprah Winfrey" and "Wally Wonka"
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Dec 28, 2017 20:22:27 GMT -5
Koffing named bronchitis
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oppy all along
TI Forumite
Who's been messing up everything? It was oppy all along
Posts: 2,767
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Post by oppy all along on Dec 29, 2017 17:37:39 GMT -5
A Sandshrew named Feminism. I'm confused and intrigued.
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oppy all along
TI Forumite
Who's been messing up everything? It was oppy all along
Posts: 2,767
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Post by oppy all along on Jan 4, 2018 19:50:13 GMT -5
Chapter 14: Fire and AshHappy 2018!Fiery Path was, funnily enough, a scorchingly hot cave where flames would occasionally erupt from the earth in a burst of heat and oh my God why couldn’t we take the cable car. Brendan and May were slogging through it, drinking plenty of water and wishing they could be anywhere else. Many of their Pokémon had felt the same way; the Water and Grass Pokémon in particular noping right out. But for a couple of them, the Fiery Path was simply a delightful time. Brendan had caught his Slugma from this very cave and the little lava slug was enjoying the trip back to his natural habitat. Chopotkin was braving the cave with the wide grin that was quickly becoming his trademark despite the sweat he was constantly wiping away from his eyes. “Ugh… what’s so great about the fiery cave, Chopotkin? I hate this.” Oprah grumbled. Brendan was equally grumbly, but couldn't pass up the opportunity to share Pokémon facts. “It’s a Machop thing. They like extreme weather conditions."Chopotkin agreed. <This is great! I should do some push ups!> Machop bounded ahead a short distance and started doing push ups as he waited for the humans to catch up. “No offence, I hate your Machop.” Brendan groaned as they struggled onwards. “Me too.”(-----) They (finally) made it out of the hell cave, where Oprah and Brendan had spent a while lying under the nearest shade they could find and angrily cursing caves. “I mean it, I’m going to catch a flying Pokémon and be one of those people who flies everywhere.” Oprah declared. Brendan stopped to ponder. “I always worried if I used Fly I’d be hit by an airplane.”“I’d rather be hit by a plane than EVER go through a cave again.”They recovered enough to stagger on and then continued on their journey, stumbling across a rest stop for trainers run by an old lady. Appropriately, there was a sign outside saying 'Old Lady's Rest Stop'. They decided to stay the night; they were exhausted and dehydrated, and their Pokémon had accrued some bumps and bruises from the various trainers between Mauville and where they were now. Which, after checking their PokéNavs, they determined was less than halfway to Fallarbor Town. That was a depressing revelation. The room Oprah and Brendan had been assigned was too small for them and all of their Pokémon to comfortably hang out in, so John Seeda, Lonzo, and Chopotkin had gone outside to get some exercise. John Seeda and Lonzo were practicing their tumbling, same as always, when Lonzo noticed Chopotkin juggling a boulder. A figurative lightbulb appeared above Lonzo's head: if Chopotkin hurled them Lonzo could soar through the air majestically! It would be amazing! Lonzo sidled up to Chopotkin, insofar as the Ball Pokémon could sidle. <So… you're pretty good at throwing that rock, right? You seem really strong.> Lonzo inquired. <You think that's cool? Check this out.> With a grunt of effort, Chopotkin flexed, and then shattered the boulder with an almighty squeeze. Chopotkin smirked, proud of his strength. Lonzo blanched, insofar as the Ball Pokémon could blanch. <Why do you ask?>Lonzo backpedalled. <Oh, it's nothing, I don't mean to bother yo-> Ham Lincoln appeared out of nowhere, carrying a spoon in one hand and a pineapple in the other. John Seeda looked suspiciously at Ham Lincoln. <Hey, what were you doing? Where did you get that?><Nothing. Don’t worry your leaf about it.> Ham Lincoln teleported back inside. John Seeda bristled. <I'm sick of the leaf jokes.> John Seeda muttered to himself. <I think it’s quite fetching.> Chopotkin offered. <Nobody asked you, new guy.>(-----) The next morning Brendan and Oprah awoke refreshed and ready to go. They packed up their possessions at a leisurely pace and thanked the old lady who ran the rest stop. When they told her they would be leaving today, she said very nicely that they seemed like very nice young children and there was no need for them to leave. In fact, they could stay as long as they liked with her and it wouldn’t be a problem. They could even stay forever. This made Brendan and Oprah leave much more quickly than they had planned, hurriedly riding away as the old lady waved forlornly from the door frame. (They've had the bikes the whole time, it's just that a lot of the time the terrain isn't conducive to safe bike-riding, like in a cave.) “Maybe she was just lonely.” Brendan reasoned. “Or maybe she’s going to Misery us! Walk faster!”As the hustled away from the sad old lady who may or may not have been planning to kidnap them, they ran into a mysterious figure. A gentleman who gave the impression that he lived an alternative life style, a life on the wild side. They couldn’t explain what exactly gave them that impression… oh right, it’s because he’s a smelly hobo. “Greetings, grasshoppers! My name is Aarune and I am a Secret Base Expert! Tell me, can you smell it?” Oprah and Brendan believed that they could indeed smell it, but were too polite to say so. “Smell what?”“The scent of adventure!” Aarune exclaimed with a flourish. “This tree right here, this secret spot. With one move, it could be transformed into a Super-Secret Base!”“What’s a Secret Base?” Brendan asked, before Oprah could stop him. From experience she knew when a forced tutorial was about to start. “I’m thrilled you asked, little bro!” Aarune responded excitedly. Oprah sighed. “Time for a lecture from Uncle Aarune. Let’s start with what a Super-Secret Base is. Romance! Adventure! Awesome! Not having to live by the rules of The Man!”Brendan rubbed his chin. “But none of that explains what a Secret Base is.”“I see you are quite the inquisitive soul! If you will, please observe. Traveller, come on out!” Aarune gleamed with joy as he summoned a Flygon. “On this tree, if you please. Secret Power!” Traveller summoned a glowing power from within himself and cast it at the tree. An explosion of dust, smoke, and glitter obscured the tree momentarily. When the smoke cleared, the tree appeared unchanged. A vine however, trailed down from the leafy canopy. Aarune invited the two children to climb into his secret treehouse far from where anyone could see them. The old lady doesn’t seem so bad now. Undaunted, Brendan climbed the vine and disappeared into the canopy. “WOAH!” A curious Oprah climbed after him. Somehow, the inside of the tree had transformed into a room. The floor was unvarnished natural wood, but somehow smooth enough to not be a splinter hazard. The walls were a combination of wood and leaves, and the ceiling was a canopy of leaves as secure as any actual building, protecting those inside from the elements as well as never dropping any twigs or detritus into the room. Despite being, you know, leaves. “But… what… how?” Oprah, flabbergasted, had trouble making the good words. “It’s bigger on the inside than it is on the outside.” Aarune explained matter-of-factly. “But that makes no sense!”Brendan was unconcerned with the specifics. “This is awesome!”“Right, little man? You get the beauty of this. Not needing to live in a ‘house’ or pay ‘rent’ to The Man, or ‘shower’.” Aarune spoke with a fire and passion matched perhaps only by Maxie. “This is all man needs to live by his own laws! I want you to have this Secret Base, Jeremy!”“It’s Brendan.”“Sure, that too! And I’ll give you both the TM for Secret Power, so you can go around and make your own Secret Bases! And remember, keep it secret. Because you can’t trust The Man.” He dropped two TMs at their feet and slid down the tree, disappearing as quickly as he appeared. Oprah rolled her eyes. “You realise if you end up like him you’ll be a smelly hobo as well.” “Yeah, it sounds great.” Brendan enthused. The logic bending didn’t stop there, as Brendan was somehow able to summon furniture into his Secret Base through his laptop – “But you didn’t even have a laptop earlier!”. Before long, his base was adorned with a bed, a desk, a nice rug, and a lamp – “How are you even getting power?”. He had even hung posters on the wall – “Your laptop isn’t connected to anything! And there is no way it should be able to summon furniture into existence! And none of this furniture is yours! How is none of this bothering you?!”“You should really stop worrying, Oprah.”(-----) All good things must come to an end. Brendan stopped decorating his Secret Base and the pair resumed their long, long journey to Fallarbor Town. They reached Route 113, a path shrouded in volcanic ash from Mt. Chimney. Somewhat paradoxically, the close proximity to a volcano kept this path unseasonably chilly. Ash and dust fell from the sky and one way or another ended up getting in their faces and possessions. Their journey was further slowed by the threat of ash in their eyes forced Brendan and Oprah to resume walking. After they passed someone carrying an umbrella, Oprah had the idea to summon Ham Lincoln and have him use his psychic abilities to keep the ash off of them. Ham Lincoln was never one to kowtow to his captors, but they did ask nicely and offer him a snack, so… “HIYA! I CHALLENGE YOU!” A ninja leaped out of a nearby dust pile, brandishing his weapon at our protagonists! Ham Lincoln fired a Psybeam at the ninja! “Wai- arrrrrrgh!” The ‘ninja’ was launched backwards, landing heavily. After the initial shock wore off, Oprah and Brendan realised it was just a young boy dressed as a ninja and wielding a stick. “Oh my Arceus you attacked a child.” Oprah said blankly. <I thought he was after me!> Ham Lincoln shouted, still panicking. “We'll have to hide out from the police in Brendan's new magic treehouse.”“We’re helping him you jerks.” Brendan huffed. Thankfully, the Ninja Boy seemed mostly unharmed. However, he informed Oprah and Brendan of a serious mission that needed to be undertaken. The fate of his Ninja Village rested in his hands. And yet because of his grievous injuries inflicted by the pair and their Kadabra (grievous injuries of which there was no physical evidence whatsoever), he would be unable to complete his mission. The only thing now standing between his Ninja Village and total annihilation was Oprah and Brendan. It would be difficult and perilous, and surely delay their travel plans even longer. But surely noble heroes such as they would do whatever they could to save his Ninja Village? Oprah sighed. (-----) Back in Littleroot Town, Caroline and Anthrax waited in Professor Birch’s lab. Caroline had received a phone call from Birch, who said it was something about Oprah and could she please come into the lab when she had the time. She was in the middle of a Game of Bones marathon as well. It's like our human Game of Thrones but prominently features Cubone and Marowak. You know nothing, Cu Bone. “Ah, I’m glad you’re here.” Professor Birch greeted Caroline warmly. “I received something from your daughter not too long ago. As I gave her a Pokédex, any surplus Pokémon your daughter catches get sent here.”“Wait, how does that work?” Caroline questioned. Professor Birch waved a hand dismissively. “That’s not worth explaining now. The point is, your daughter has sent a Pokémon. It's quite friendly and well-behaved, and I wondered if you might want to take care of it like you are her Illumise”Caroline shrugged. “Sure, why not. If they’re too much of a handful I’ll see what Norman can do to straighten them out.”“Very good then. Let’s introduce you to the Pokémon your daughter caught.” Professor Birch’s Pokédex chirped. “Sandshrew, the Mouse Pokémon. Sandshrew's body is configured to absorb water without waste, enabling it to survive in an arid desert. This Pokémon curls up to protect itself from its enemies.”“She appears to have named her new Pokémon Feminism.” Professor Birch informed Caroline. Caroline looked at the Mouse Pokémon. “Feminism? She picks the weirdest names… no offence Anthill.”<None taken.>Professor Birch shrugged. “It's a fine Pokémon. And he does seem very respectful and equality-minded.”“Wait, he?”(-----) Oprah and Brendan trudged through the ash. In the distance, the lights of Fallarbor Town glowed against the grey. “Well… that was long.” Oprah's legs felt like jelly under her. It had been a very long journey. Brendan was a little sunnier. “I guess we did save that village with the assistance of that brave Sandshrew. He’ll be a great addition to your team.”Oprah shrugged. “Sure. Can we lie down now?”PartyActiveMudbutt (Marshtomp), M, Level 27, Water/Ground, Bold, Likes to run John Seeda (Nuzleaf), M, Level 25, Grass/Dark, Hasty, Somewhat vain Meowth (Skitty), F, Level 25, Normal, Sassy, Mischievous Ham Lincoln (Kadabra), M, Level 25, Psychic, Sassy, Somewhat vain Lonzo (Voltorb), Level 25, Electric, Lonely, Takes plenty of siestas Chopotkin (Machop), M, Level 22, Fighting, Jolly, Mischievous BenchAnthrax (Illumise), F, Level 22, Bug, Bold, Alert to sounds Feminism (Sandshrew), M, Level 17, Ground, Lax, Highly curious Audience ParticipationAnd now we start the 'trying to figure out who gets run in the main team and who sits at home with Caroline' juggling act. I promise any Pokémon not with the party are still having a wondrous time, but if you have any thoughts as to how to manage it fairly then let me know. Or just really want one of the bench Pokémon to be getting more time in the party. For the choice these days, we have the Pokémon who didn't get to be chosen from because I already had that type and I wanted to build some type diversity early on. It won't happen right away, but the next time Oprah is in the area she'll pick them up.- Goldeen (Water)
- Magikarp (Water)
- Marill (Water/Fairy)
- Roselia (Grass/Poison)
- Shroomish (Grass)
- Tentacool (Water/Poison)
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Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
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Post by Deleted on Jan 4, 2018 21:26:55 GMT -5
A Shroomish named Toad
Also, huss banned from picking names from now on
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Post by 🐍 huss 🐍 on Jan 5, 2018 0:02:46 GMT -5
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Post by 🐍 huss 🐍 on Jan 5, 2018 0:06:08 GMT -5
A Shroomish named Toad Also, huss banned from picking names from now on Screw you, a Goldeen named BedroomEyes.
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oppy all along
TI Forumite
Who's been messing up everything? It was oppy all along
Posts: 2,767
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Post by oppy all along on Jan 5, 2018 0:46:30 GMT -5
I don't discriminate, I just capture the first Pokémon of the type that comes up. So yes, there's now a dude Sandshrew named Feminism
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Post by ganews on Jan 5, 2018 17:45:52 GMT -5
A Magikarp named Gilly. One of the only things I know about Pokemon is that magikarp uses flail, which I think is hilarious.
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oppy all along
TI Forumite
Who's been messing up everything? It was oppy all along
Posts: 2,767
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Post by oppy all along on Jan 5, 2018 17:48:40 GMT -5
A Magikarp named Gilly. One of the only things I know about Pokemon is that magikarp uses flail, which I think is hilarious.
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Post by ganews on Jan 5, 2018 20:02:43 GMT -5
A Magikarp named Gilly. One of the only things I know about Pokemon is that magikarp uses flail, which I think is hilarious. Because you have given me this gift, I am honor-bound to give you one in return. From my father-in-law's favorite team:
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oppy all along
TI Forumite
Who's been messing up everything? It was oppy all along
Posts: 2,767
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Post by oppy all along on Jan 13, 2018 0:10:20 GMT -5
Chapter 15: Oh Great, Not That Guy AgainA contest is contested, and other things happen.Ash hung in the sky, blotting out the sky. Two figures meet in the moonless night. The taller one walked with a limp. The shorter one, a Numel, spoke in worried tones. <Did you take care of it? Are you hurt?> Numel reached out to touch the mysterious Pokémon, but he turns away. <They won’t bother you anymore,> Ham Lincoln declares to the middle distance. Numel visibly sighs with relief. <You don’t know what this means to me. How could I possibly repay you?>Ham Lincoln gazed stoically into nothing. <That’s not why I do this.> Numel sidled up to him suggestively. <It’s a cold night. Maybe you could use someone to keep you… warm.><I need to go,> he said abruptly, brushing the other Pokémon off. <I have other responsibilities.><Oh… okay then. If you’re ever in the-> But he had already Teleported off. Ham Lincoln reappeared closer to town. It was late, his travelling companions would be going to sleep soon. He realised his channelling focus (ie: his spoon) had been dirtied in the night’s adventures as well. Ham Lincoln sighed. Limping to a nearby lake, he soaked his spoon in the lake. In the distance, he felt his trainer’s mind begin to wonder where Ham Lincoln was. Hurriedly, he Teleported into the Pokémon Centre where Oprah, Brendan, and their Pokémon were staying. He appeared out of thin air in front of Oprah. “Oh, hey Ham. Where’d you get that Magikarp?”<That wha-> Ham Lincoln noticed a Magikarp hanging off his channelling foc- his spoon. <AH! AH! GET IT OFF! GET IT OFF!>Oprah pulled out her Pokédex to evaluate the new Pokémon as it grimly hung on to Ham Lincon's spoon. “Magikarp. The Fish Pokémon. Magikarp is a pathetic excuse for a Pokémon that is only capable of flopping and splashing. This behavior prompted scientists to undertake research into it.”“Wow. Harsh.” Magikarp fell off Ham Lincoln’s spoon, flopping uselessly on the floor. She pulled out a Poké ball, reasoning it would likely get itself hurt if she didn’t catch it. Oprah has caught Gilly!... I guess. Oprah noticed Ham Lincoln's injuries. “Are you alright Ham Lincoln? Did the Magikarp hurt you?”<NO THE MAGIKARP DID NOT HURT ME.> Ham Lincoln shouted. <Hey everyone! Ham Lincoln got beat up by a Magikarp!> John Seeda chimed in. Ham Lincoln grumbled as the Pokémon in Oprah’s party laughed and Oprah rummaged in her bag for berries to heal him. (-----) Fallarbor Town was a quiet place. Part research community, part farming community, much of the outlying land was taken up by farmland. Meanwhile in the town, a particularly notable house even had a large telescope mounted to the roof to observe falling meteorites. None of which made any sense, because ash falling from the volcano obscured the sky at all times so how are you farming or using a telescope? It was nonetheless a popular community among academics and recluses due to the modest and sparse housing which afforded plenty of privacy. And in sharp contrast to the rest of the town, a shining, glamourous Contest Hall. For a few days Brendan and Oprah had enjoyed the many attractions of Fallarbor Town, like… ash. And… a big cave. Brendan had been recruited by a glassmaker who specialised in making things out of ash, with the promise of more decorations for his magic treehouse. So, he had spent his week running around with a sack collecting ash. Oprah divided her time between rolling her eyes at the maniac running around with a sack, and training. Which was good, because the time had come for… The Fallarbor Super-Rank Cuteness Pokémon Contest Spectacular! Everyone calls it the FCSRPC for short. “Is that really what you wear for the Pokémon Contests?” Brendan asked with a bemused smirk. “Lisia gave it to me.” Oprah sniffed. Meowth trilled with laughter on her shoulder. It is a pretty ridiculous outfit. And it feels kind of inappropriate. “And it looks fabulous on you!” Lisia interrupted. She’s the world’s foremost master in dramatically entering conversations. “I just saw your name on the run sheet and I had to come find you! Am I a great scout or what?!”Brendan went beet-red. “Oh, wow, that’s-… you’re-…”“Yup!” Lisia confirmed with a dazzling smile. Meowth and Ali greeted each other as well. <Hey Altaria! Your trainer smells like honey. Why doesn’t my trainer smell like honey?><You travel with children, Skitty. They smell bad.>“Oprah, the Super-Rank is like waaaaaaay above what you faced in Normal-Rank. Everyone competing today has serious talent and already has wins under their belt. You and Meowth are going to have to bring it today.” Oprah nodded. <Hell yeah!> Meowth shouted. “That’s the spirit!” Lisia laughed “But you… you’re Lisia.” Brendan was still having some trouble with words. It’s worth remembering that Lisia is a very famous icon in the Hoenn region. She’s essentially the Taylor Swift of the Hoenn region. Oprah is friends with Steven Jobs and Taylor Swift. Look what you made me do. “That’s right, honey. I have to dash, but I’ll be in the audience tonight Oprah! I’ll be cheering for you!” With that Lisia dashed off. She really is a very busy person. “I really thought you were kidding about knowing her.”“Nope, we’re friends on PokéSpace and everything.” “Woah.” “Yep, she uses a fake name.”<I want to sniff her hair.> Pokémon can be creepy sometimes. (-----) “That was sooooo great!” Lisia gushed. “You and Meowth were amazing!”Oprah, Brendan, Lisia, and their Pokémon were hosting an impromptu victory party. “Yeah, you were way better than the other trainers!”Oprah blushed. “They were all really good…” “This is a new chapter in your Pokémon Contest journey! I'm calling it... ‘Is This a Dream? Am I a Future Contest Star?’ Ahhhh, it's so marvellous!”Lisia and Ali had to leave again to continue their insane schedules. Brendan and Lisia were celebrating and drinking non-alcoholic celebratory drinks when they were approached by a man and his Poochyena. He looked familiar but they couldn't quite place him. “I saw you in the Contest just now! I didn’t know your name was Oprah.”Oprah and Brendan exchanged a look. “I’m sorry, who are you?” Brendan asked. “Yeah, we don’t know yo-“ A look of horrified realisation dawned on Oprah’s face. A guy with a Poochyena who knows her? “Oh great, not that guy again. Mudbutt get him!” Mudbutt advanced menacingly. “WAIT WAIT WAIT” The man and his Poochyena recoiled. “Team Magma fired me, remember?! I wanted to thank you!”Oprah looked at him with suspicion. “We don’t even know your name. You’re just ‘random guy who keeps threatening and attacking us’.” “We’re sorry about that, we really are. It was a job, y’know?” The former Team Magma grunt tried to rationalise to an unimpressed audience. “I know the things I did were wrong. That’s why I owe you. Because you, well, kept beating us, we had to find something else to do with our lives.”“Which is?”“Contests! Poochie and I are going to take over the Coolness Contest scene. We’re only at Super-Rank so far, but we’re going to keep working!” The former Team Magma grunt looked enthusiastic, then nervous. He looked around for a second. “Actually, are you guys still… you know, foiling Team Magma? Because I heard something might be going down.”Brendan looked worried. “Can’t you tell the police about this?”“No!” He interjected sharply. “Maxie has people everywhere. So does Archie. How do you think they're able to be so open with their activities?" "Who's Archie?" Oprah asked. "It doesn't matter. The important thing is something bad might be going down, and I can't stop them. They'll see me coming, and they know things about me. About my family. I'll give you an address. Can you please look into it? Maybe I'm wrong and nothing happened, but I need to be certain.” The man wrote down something on a piece of paper, and handed it to the children before hurrying off. Oprah read it aloud. "Professor Cozmo. The house with the giant telescope on it."(-----) “Team Magma took your husband a couple of hours ago?” Oprah asked the crying woman. “Yes! They said they needed his research for something, and they led him away. I heard they were going to Meteor Falls.” Yup, that’s a plot hook. “We’re going to find Professor Cozmo and bring him back. I promise.” Oprah declared with a determined gleam in her eye. PartyActiveMudbutt (Marshtomp), M, Level 27, Water/Ground, Bold, Likes to run John Seeda (Nuzleaf), M, Level 25, Grass/Dark, Hasty, Somewhat vain Meowth (Skitty), F, Level 25, Normal, Sassy, Mischievous Ham Lincoln (Kadabra), M, Level 25, Psychic, Sassy, Somewhat vain Lonzo (Voltorb), Level 25, Electric, Lonely, Takes plenty of siestas Chopotkin (Machop), M, Level 22, Fighting, Jolly, Mischievous BenchAnthrax (Illumise), F, Level 22, Bug, Bold, Alert to sounds Feminism (Sandshrew), M, Level 17, Ground, Lax, Highly curious Gilly (Magikarp), M, Level 10, Water, Relaxed, Likes to run Audience ParticipationNot included in the chapter, Professor Birch informing Caroline she'll need to install a fish tank. And on to the next one. The name will be chosen first by the most popular Pokémon, then by the choice with the most upvotes, then by me asking someone in the Shoutbox to please arbitrarily decide between the remaining options.1: Magnemite (Electric/Steel) 2: Solrock (Rock/Psychic) 3: Spoink (Psychic) 4: Swablu (Normal/Flying) 5: Zangoose (Normal)
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jan 13, 2018 0:45:10 GMT -5
Unrelated, but as a child I always just figured Brendan had white hair. I vote for a Swablu named Puffy
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