Chapter 17: A Blazing ClimaxIt’s time for the end of Act One! Alternate subtitle: Bloody hell, we’re still in Act One?Oprah had reached the Cable Car at the base of Mt. Chimney. She noticed that the Team Magma grunts guarding the entrance were no longer there. That
could mean Team Magma had packed up and left and Oprah wouldn’t have to do anything. That definitely isn't what happened. But it could be that. Heart pounding and hand on her Poké balls, Oprah entered the cable car building. Everything looked normal. Oprah approached the reception desk with a smile she hoped looked more confident than she felt.
“Hi. I’d like to catch a cable car to the top of the mountain?”“You don’t want to go there today.” The receptionist warned with a forced smile.
“Inclement weather. You should see Mauville City.”“It’s okay. I’m here to stop them.” Did she still seem more confident than she felt? Arceus she hoped so.
The receptionist did not look reassured.
“You’re just a kid.”
Oprah flashed her gym badges at her.
“I can take care of myself.”"I'll be the judge of that!" She threw her computer aside and leaped on top of her desk. A+ dramatic villain reveal.
"For Team Aqua! Goldeen, go!""John Seeda, I choose you!"*thirty seconds later*
The office was in disarray. Razor sharp leaves were embedded in the desk and walls and Goldeen was unconscious.
"That's really dangerous, kid!" shrieked the 'receptionist'.
"Whatever." Oprah shrugged off the impotent villain.
"Where do they find you guys?""Villainous unemployment office.""Great. Now, how do I get to the top of Mt. Chimney?"(-----)
Well. This was certainly unpleasant.
Oprah stood at the rim of a 5,000 feet tall volcanic mountain. All around were spectacular views of Hoenn. Heat emanated out of the molten core of the great volcano. It was truly a magnificent sight. Oh, yeah, and crowds of Team Magma and Team Aqua grunts were in the middle of a massive Pokémon gang war.
Dark, game.
Hordes of mostly unevolved Pokémon battled ferociously. Team Magma had superior numbers and had secured the area, but Team Aqua fought bitterly to turn the tide. Get it, tide? Eh? Whatever. Oprah summoned her entire party from their Poké Balls, so they too could be shocked and terrified and regret coming here.
<Compatriots, please!> Ham Lincoln implored his fellow Pokémon.
<You fight at the whim of madmen! For the good of all the Pokémon in Hoenn you must cease this!>Mudbutt rolled their eyes.
<Nobody listens when you talk.><I listen!> Chopotkin chimed in.
<I do not care.> Came the dismissive response from Ham.
Oprah heard someone curse in an ineptly written pirate accent.
“Blast it! Clear the deck ye scurvy dogs, or face a keelhauling!” Archie, the leader of Team Aqua, and his partner Muk were battling multiple Team Magma members. Muk lashed out with powerful Poison attacks, but for each Pokémon he felled it seemed another took its place.
“Davy Jones take ye bilge rats! Maxie must be stopped!” Right, where is Maxie… the ominous ramp overlooking the Mt. Doom-like volcano. Sure.
“Hey, it’s that kid who keeps interfering in our villainous schemes! Stop her before she reaches the boss!” Uh oh.
Any Team Magma members who weren't currently fending off Team Aqua turned their attention to Oprah. This bodes well. However, Oprah's team were tough and battle-hardened. Team Magma grunts by and large didn't seem to get much time to raise their Pokémon. Meowth lulled large groups asleep with her Sing attack and Mudbutt and Chopotkin were the muscle. Lonzo and John Seeda roved around the battlefield using their agility and speed to get cheap shots in, while Ham Lincoln knocked flying Pokémon out of the sky with uncanny accuracy. This didn't account for the elite mooks though. A fully evolved Machamp was striding through the swarm of mook Pokémon, two out of his four arms over his ears to block the sound of Meowth's Sing. In the sky a Golbat flew too quickly for Ham Lincoln to hit and rained down Air Cutters on our intrepid heroes.
<Ah!> John Seeda barely evaded an Air Cutter.
<Get that [expletive] bat!>Ham Lincoln Teleported out of the way of another Air Cutter.
<I am incapable of flight! It would have been prudent of Oprah to procure a flying Pokémon at some point! Though I of course strongly oppose the acquisition of Pokémon to-><I can get it!> Lonzo interrupted as he zipped between Machamp's legs.
<I just need to get up in their air first! Does anyone have experience propelling a spherical Pokémon into the air at great speed?>Mudbutt grinned. (Read Chapter 4)
Mudbutt fired Lonzo into the air with a torrential Water Gun!
<WOOOOOOOOOOO!> Lonzo used Volt Switch, which coated Lonzo in electricity and allowed him to propel themself in midair right into Golbat! The flying Pokémon was stunned and heavily damaged, and unprepared for the move's secondary effect where Lonzo could switch places with another Pokémon in his team.
Ham Lincoln appeared out of thin air in front of Golbat.
<Dodge this.> Ham Lincoln blasted Golbat out of the sky with a Psybeam!
"Great work!" Ham Lincoln started falling to the ground from twenty feet in the air.
"Oh crap. Someone catch him please!" Mudbutt set off like a receiver running down a long pass. Speaking of catching things, Machamp threw a boulder at the party!
<Hey! That’s my move!> Chopotkin protested. He and John Seeda ‘caught’ the boulder (protecting Oprah and Meowth from being squished), in that it they ran in the way and it then collided with them and knocked them over. Machamp cheered in triumph and advanced menacingly. Meowth climbed onto the boulder to look the villainous eye-to-eye. Well, eye-to-chest. Machamp prepared to attack the much smaller Pokémon, but Meowth used Attract! However that strange magic worked, Machamp was temporarily immobilised by infatuation.
<I did it! Okay please save me now guys.> Meowth hid behind the boulder she had been standing on before. From some distance away Lonzo and Mudbutt fired long range attacks at Machamp. He was hurt, but also really mad. Chopotkin was able to get under the boulder and left it over his head. With a triumphant shout, he threw the boulder back at Machamp! Machamp caught it, like actually caught it rather than Choptkin and John Seeda's falling under it. But John Seeda sprang into the air and shattered the rock (and Machamp's defence) with a tremendous Rock Smash attack! Machamp staggered back, dazed. Lonzo zoomed in with another Volt Switch attack, hurting Machamp further but not quite finishing him off. Lonzo disappeared in a flash of electricity and Mudbutt appeared in his place, nailing Machamp with a point-blank Mud Bomb! That did it! Machamp was returned to his Poké Ball.
“We’re doing great! We’re almost at Maxie!”A familiar, shrill cackle rattled through the ears of Oprah and her party.
“Look what the Delcatty dragged in. Or Skitty, I guess you haven't been able to evolve her yet." Tabitha's cackle was incredibly grating.
"I’ve been waiting for a rematch with you impossible children! But where is your friend?"
“Don’t need him.” Sounding more confident than she feels is Oprah’s thing now.
John Seeda rubbed his hands together.
<I’ve been waiting for this!>
vs ![Picture](https://cdn.bulbagarden.net/upload/thumb/f/f1/262Mightyena.png/250px-262Mightyena.png)
Mightyena let out an intimidating Roar, but John Seeda shrugged it off. Mightyena may have been bigger, stronger, and faster than John Seeda, but John Seeda had the most important thing – misplaced confidence. John Seeda and Mightyena charged at each other. Mightyena pounced with claw and tooth, but John Seeda leaped into the air and came down on Mightyena with a Rock Smash attack. Tabitha groaned as his Pokémon staggered backwards, his defence weakened by the strength of John Seeda’s attack.
Tabitha pulled at his hair.
“Oh, you nasty child! You are TOO MUCH!” Tabitha has definitively lost his cool. If he ever had any.
Oprah smirked. Away from the battle with Mightyena, her Pokémon were holding off other Team Magma grunts and watching her back.
“Having some trouble?”“I am going to enjoy CRUSHING YOU LIKE THE INSIGNIFICANT SPECK THAT YOU ARE!" Tabitha screamed at Oprah.
Mightyena used Snarl! It was an angry yell containing such malice and fury that it caused physical and psychic damage to John Seeda. Somehow. John Seeda recoiled and held his hands over his ears. Mightyena lunged at the Grass Pokémon and slammed him with Assurance, an attack that does more damage to a Pokémon that has recently taken damage. John Seeda scrambled to his feet and connected with a Leaf Blade, but Mightyena tanked the damage and struck back with another Assurance! Mightyena stood over his defeated opponent and roared, but was struck by a leaping attack from a tiny Pokémon! Meowth looked pleased with herself, at least until Mightyena turned and faced her.
<Heyyyyyyy Mightyena. No hard feelings, right?>
vs ![Picture](https://cdn.bulbagarden.net/upload/thumb/f/f1/262Mightyena.png/250px-262Mightyena.png)
<Ummmm… Mudbutt? Chopotkin? SOMEBODY?!>
Mightyena and Tabitha did matching cackles as Mightyena advanced menacingly on Meowth. Meowth used Attract! She nuzzled Mightyena's leg and purred gently in an attempt to endear herself to the much larger Pokémon. I mean, I guess it worked with Machamp earlier? Unfortunately Mightyena was able to resist Meowth's temptations and batted her aside with a contemptuous swipe!
Tabitha laughed hysterically and clutched his sides.
“Did you see how far your Skitty flew! Bwahahahahahaha!”Mightyena used Snarl, but Meowth blocked his sound-based attack with Sing! Meowth's melodic, hypnotic song overpowered the nasty snarl and gently lulled Mightyena into a resting state. His eyelids grew heavy and he sagged to the ground. Mightyena was in a state of total relxa- Meowth slammed into him with all her might with a Wake-Up Slap! It was a terrific hit, connecting for extra damage due to Mightyena's weakened defence and dealing further damage to a sleeping opponent.
<I did it! I did it! I’m the best!> Meowth cheered. However, her attack was not powerful enough to finish Mightyena off.
Well and truly roused out of his resting state, all Mightyena knew was pain and fury directed at the tiny kitten Pokémon.
<Oh this is going to HURT BADLY little Skitty.> He snarled. With an enraged Roar, Mightyena stunned Meowth with terror. He lunged, leaping at Meowth with tooth and claw!
<AHHHHHHHHH- wait, I’m not dead.><I’ve… got… you!> Chopotkin grunted with exertion as he held Mightyena back from probably ripping Meowth to shreds. Chopotkin struggled to keep his grip on Mightyena. Tabitha and Oprah both stared as he started glowing.
![Picture](https://cdn.bulbagarden.net/upload/thumb/8/8e/067Machoke.png/250px-067Machoke.png)
Chopotkin has evolved into
Machoke!
<Nobody hurts my teammates!> He shouted with rage as he inexorably dragged Mightyena into a bear hug.
"Machoke. The Superpower Pokémon. Machoke's thoroughly toned muscles possess the hardness of steel. This Pokémon has so much strength, it can easily hold aloft a sumo wrestler on just one finger." Oprah's Pokédex chimed.
vs ![Picture](https://cdn.bulbagarden.net/upload/thumb/f/f1/262Mightyena.png/250px-262Mightyena.png)
This was a short one. Already heavily damaged from battling John Seeda and Meowth, Mightyena was quickly dispatched when the newly evolved Chopotkin leaped into the air and brought him down to Earth with a thunderous Seismic Toss!
Tabitha howled with displeasure. "YOU FILTHY, ROTTEN CHILD! FINE! CONFRONT MAXIE THEN!" Tabitha got really uncomfortably close. "But know that I was trying to spare you. Anything I've done, I'm nothing compared to him." He cackled as Oprah returned John Seeda and Meowth. Tabitha ordered the rest of Team Magma to leave her and refocus their efforts on stymieing Team Magma, and that Maxie would deal with the child personally. Oprah gathered her team and prepared to confront Maxie.
“That is quite enough, child.” Maxie steepled his fingers in a classic villain pose.
“Out of respect for the courage and skill it has taken you to reach here, I will attempt to educate you instead of simply extinguishing you.” The furious conflict echoed around them as Maxie literally stopped everything to explain his plan to a small child.
“You see, thousands of years ago there was an ancient Pokémon. It was wild, unfocused, deadly… primal. It very nearly unmade the Earth.”“Groudon.” Oprah breathed. (Read Chapter 8 again.)
Maxie arched an eyebrow.
“You are better informed than one would expect of a child. Then again, you are no ordinary child, are you? What the stories won’t tell you is that Groudon had the most amazing power. It could create land masses out of nothing, large enough to sustain colonies! And through that, the power to create life. But it slumbers, locked away somewhere. So what must we do to awaken it, harness its power for good? Our research led us here. Under the right conditions, this Meteorite could be able to become something greater. Perhaps even a Mega Stone, or a Key Stone. Something that would allow us to control Groudon! Would it not be glorious?” He asked with a gleam in his eye.
“Right, right… or… we could not be insane and not do any of that?" Oprah offered.
Maxie harrumphed.
“Too much, then, to expect a mere child to understand my vision. Very well then. Choose your champion, and I will choose mine. I will bury you by my own hand. I hope you appreciate this honour.”Dark, game.
There’s only one Pokémon Oprah would use in this situation.
“Mudbutt, I choose you!” With typical villainous flair, Maxie summoned his Camerupt.
vs ![Picture](https://cdn.bulbagarden.net/upload/thumb/7/7d/323Camerupt.png/250px-323Camerupt.png)
Going back to the ol' reliable, Mudbutt fired a Water Gun at Camerupt! Camerupt blocked with a Lava Plume! Scarlet flames vented out of Camerupt, evaporating Mudbutt’s water attack and scorching him to add injury to insult. Camerupt attacked with Earth Power, causing the earth under Mudbutt’s feet to erupt with power! The attacks were theoretically not effective against Water/Ground types but Camerupt attacked with such force that type matchups didn't keep Mudbutt from getting utterly clobbered.
Camerupt fired a Flame Burst at Mudbutt. Using another old tactic Mudbutt used his water to muddy the earth around him and use the mud to dodge and manoeuvre. He was able to evade another Earth Power and ended up behind Camerupt. The large Pokémon was very slow to turn and face Mudbutt, giving him plenty of time to load up and fire a point blank Mud Bomb attack! The inexplicably explosive blob of mud hit Camerupt with full force. However when the mud cleared, Camerupt was unfazed. Another Lava Plume knocked Mudbutt backwards. A bruised and battered Mudbutt tried to skate around the field again, but was knocked off his feet when Camerupt let off another Lava Plume attack that dried up the mud.
“Amnesia, child.” Maxie explained.
“It’s a move which sharply boosts the Special Defence of a Pokémon. Speaking of which, I do believe you’re out of moves.”“Mudbutt…” Oprah whispered.
“I don’t know what to do.”<You need to get take the others and get out of here. I can handle the big idiot.> Mudbutt whispered back. This was a very sophisticated sentiment to communicate non-verbally. Don't question it.
“No! I’m staying with you!” Oprah fumed.
<You’re stupid! You’re too weak and useless to help me fight him! You need to run away and hide with the other weak Pokémon!> The words sound mean, but I assure you they’re coming from a good place.
“Enough. It’s time to end this.” Camerupt’s eyes were dead and merciless. Mudbutt stood defiantly, too dehydrated to try the mud trick again and too stubborn to back down. His stupid, weak, and useless human was there as well.
“EVERYBODY FREEZE! THIS IS THE POLICE!”Police officers and their Pokémon suddenly appeared, demanding everyone freeze and return their Pokémon to their Poké Balls! They swarmed the fighting Pokémon gangs, most of whom surrendered easily after a long and exhausting fight. Archie was apoplectic as he was dragged off, kicking and screaming that he was the good guy and the police should be thanking him. (He wasn't, and they didn't.) Maxie sighed in frustration as the officers approached he and Oprah.
"This does not mark the end of my ambitions." He warned sternly.
"And you would do well to stay out of my way child."Officers led Maxie off, but were confused about what to do with Oprah. A man in a long brown coat approached.
"Sir, there is a child here. She doesn't seem to be affiliated with Team Aqua or Team Magma.""What in Arceus's name is a child doing here?"(-----)
"Is there anything else, Detective Looker?" It had been a long day. They had escorted Oprah to the Pokémon Centre in Lavaridge Town and given her Pokémon to the Centre to heal. Oprah had just finished recounting the events that led her to be fighting Team Magma atop a volcano.
"No, I do believe that is enough for your statement." said the man who was the spitting image of a globe-travelling gumshoe. "
My Croagunk and I travel the world investigating crime. Of recent interest were the activities were the criminal syndicates known as Team Magma and Team Aqua. We received a tip from the local police that there would be criminal activity on Mount Chimney. But you say they are intent on a legendary Pokémon?""Maxie, he kept ranting about Groudon. How he was going to remake the Earth."Looker rubbed his brow.
"Worrying. And you say this is not the first time you've gotten involved with Team Magma. Tell me, why did you take it upon yourself to pursue them?"Oprah's mind went blank. Why indeed? By any metric it was a resoundingly terrible idea.
"I just needed to stop them." She mumbled.
Looker raised an eyebrow.
“Stop them? Alone? But you’re just a child.”“I wasn’t alone. And, I met a former member of their Team. He said they had people inside the police.”“Ah, you are a trainer, and a formidable one at that.” Looker gave her a nod of acknowledgement.
“But it would probably be for the best if you stayed out of such things in future. They may have nebulous 'people', they may not. But we are the International Police! The global elite of law enforcement! We are a step above what these groups are used to dealing with. And besides, there likely will not be any further Team Aqua or Team Magma plots that require foiling anyhow. As we speak our top detectives (aside from myself) are interrogating the members of Team Aqua and Team Magma that we arrested today. And any intelligence we are able to obtain, we will use to sweep up the remnants of their organisations."“Do you know what the Meteorite was for?” Oprah asked.
“It sounded really bad.”Looker paused before speaking.
“You’ve put too much on your plate, I think. A young lady like you should be journeying with her Pokémon and winning gym badges. Whatever the Meteorite was meant to accomplish, we have stopped. Why don’t you rest up here? I hear the hot springs are divine.” Lavaridge Town. Where Oprah was planning to go all along before this insanity started.
“Yeah, that sounds good.”Detective Looker looked as though he had remembered something.
“One more thing. It seems that in all the commotion, a wild Pokémon has infiltrated one of my Poké Balls." He pulled a Poké Ball out of his case.
"I am a very busy globe-trotting detective, and I don't have time to take care of a new Pokémon. Especially given my line of work is quite dangerous. Would you be able to find a good home for her?"“Sure thing.”![Picture](https://cdn.bulbagarden.net/upload/thumb/9/9e/325Spoink.png/250px-325Spoink.png)
Looks like that Spoink… got sprung. Oprah caught
Mix-A-Lot!
“Spoink, the Bounce Pokémon. Spoink bounces around on its tail. The shock of its bouncing makes its heart pump. As a result, this Pokémon cannot afford to stop bouncing—if it stops, its heart will stop.”Dark, game.
PartyActive
Mudbutt (Marshtomp), M, Level 30, Water/Ground, Bold, Likes to run
John Seeda (Nuzleaf), M, Level 28, Grass/Dark, Hasty, Somewhat vain
Meowth (Skitty), F, Level 28, Normal, Sassy, Mischievous
Ham Lincoln (Kadabra), M, Level 28, Psychic, Sassy, Somewhat vain
Lonzo (Voltorb), Level 28, Electric, Lonely, Takes plenty of siestas
Chopotkin (Machoke), M, Level 28, Fighting, Jolly, Mischievous
Bench
Anthrax (Illumise), F, Level 22, Bug, Bold, Alert to sounds
Mix-A-Lot (Spoink), F, Level 20, Psychic, Quirky, Alert to sounds
Feminism (Sandshrew), M, Level 17, Ground, Lax, Highly curious
Gilly (Magikarp), M, Level 10, Water, Relaxed, Likes to run
Audience ParticipationOne third of the way through! Woooooo! Next up, the Lavaridge Gym Leader, Flannery, uses a Torkoal. Any nickname suggestions?
![](https://cdn.bulbagarden.net/upload/3/3b/324Torkoal.png)